OBAMAFU.COM
Because enough is enough.
Because enough is enough.Obamadays Passed: Pelosidays Passed: 730
Pelosidays Passed: 730Left: Left: None
Left: None
NOW IN PRINT:
Barack Obama is a Big-Eared Idiot and other undeniable life's truths Volume 1: The Failure's Log November 4, 2010
Forecasting the news, we'd say
Bamster will be denounced today. F#@k-You-Meter has moved past the point “Disapproved”. It is now at “F#@k all you say”. November 3, 2010
He has worked as a tireless drover,
and his herd ate it all, grain and stover. Now nothing is left for his friends from the left. Listen, Bamster: it's time to bend over.
The Israelites, so long as the vengeance
was not directed against their own people, viewed the defeat of wicked enemies, whether by themselves or others, as the justifiable recompenses of Yahweh. G. W. Trompf Payback: the logic of retribution in Melanesian religions (1994)
Chalk up another victory to the human spirit.
Planet of the Apes (1968) October 4, 2009
Europe seems to have gotten enough
of the endless Obamian guff. Bamster, here is a hint for the rest of your stint: you are dumb, so — you better be tough...
If a man is dumb, someone is going to get the best of him,
so why not you? If you don't, you're as dumb as he is. Arnold Rothstein quoted in The Big Bankroll: The Life and Times of Arnold Rothstein by Leo Katcher (1959) October 3, 2009
The entire Obamian Force
now blames it on Rio, of course, still unable to see what observed IOC: just an ass, braying loud and hoarse.
Where'er an ass is crown'd to fame,
both town and country bear the shame. German proverb in A Polyglot of Foreign Proverbs by Henry George Bohn (1857) October 2, 2009
The ObamoOlympics? No more.
Both Obamas had taken the floor in a failed pas de deux, neither having a clue what the f#@k the Olympics are for...
...if one's tongue don't move in the steps of the day,
and thinks to please by its old graces, it is only an object of ridicule... Horace Walpole The letters of Horace Walpole (1840)
All the misfortunes of mankind,
all the dreadful disasters that fill the history books, the blunders of politicians and the faults of omission of great commanders, all this comes from not knowing how to dance. Molière Le Bourgeois gentilhomme (1670) October 1, 2009
Mrs. Bum (that's Michelle — don't twitch...)
in ObamoOlympical pitch spoke of her SACRIFICE (didn't think of it twice...). Please come up with a clue for this b#@ch.
If the First Family gets a female dog,
will she be the First B#@ch or will she have to settle for second place? Burt Prelutsky quoted in Townhall: Michelle Obama is a B#@ch, Get It? (2009)
... the usual fortune of complaints,...
to have excited more contempt than pity. Samuel Johnson The lives of the most eminent English poets (1805) September 30, 2009
M. Obama flew to Copenhagen;
IOC's exaltation is laggin' far behind her behind. We can read their mind: “Don't look. You'll be sore from gaggin'...”
America is supposed to be given over to ugliness.
There are a good many ugly things there; and the ugliest are the most pretentious. Goldwin Smith Lectures and Essays (1881)
Social progress can be measured exactly
by the social position of the fair sex (the ugly ones included). Karl Marx Letters to Dr. Kugelmann (1868) September 29, 2009
Bamster, there is an imminent trouble
with your bursting publicity bubble filled with all the bulls#@t that you — daily — emit. Get your a#@ off TV — on the double.
They ought to pass a rule in this Country
that in any investigations, if a Man couldn't tell the truth the first time he shouldn't be allowed to try again. Will Rogers The Illiterate Digest (1924)
Talk that does not end in any kind of action
is better suppressed altogether. Thomas Carlyle Inaugural address, Edinburgh (1866) September 28, 2009
A conspiracy, vast and right-wing,
is attacking The Idiot King. Bet a buck to a dime: it's so racist this time that he can't accomplish a thing...
The oblique paradox of propaganda is
that the lie in the throat becomes, by repetition, the truth in the heart. John Grierson Re-thinking Grierson: The Ideology of John Grierson (1987) September 27, 2009
Have you searched for your inner Obama?
Could your soul be a part of his drama? Are you stupid, insane, narcissistic, profane, (please continue beyond the last comma)?...
This is the very worst wickedness,
that we refuse to acknowledge the passionate evil that is in us. This makes us secret and rotten. D. H. Lawrence Letter to Lady Ottoline Morrell (April 8, 1915)
A true criminal becomes a popular figure
because he unburdens in no small degree the consciences of his fellow man, for now they know once more where evil is to be found. Carl Jung The integration of the personality (1950) September 26, 2009
“Red or yellow, black or white,
are all equal in his sight”. This is what the children sang praising Bamster's “Sturm und Drang”. Make a note: color's order starts with Red. Expect disorder.
Yes, we know — this is not a limerick.
But we liked it.
He said red, yellow, black or white,
all are equal in his sight. Mmm, mmm, mmm, Barack Hussein Obama. Yes! Mmm, mmm, mmm, Barack Hussein Obama. Children's song
The Joker: Introduce a little anarchy.
Upset the established order, and everything becomes chaos. I'm an agent of chaos. Oh, and you know the thing about chaos? It's fair! The Dark Knight (2008) September 25, 2009
News: Islam is on Capitol Hill.
This must be The Obamian Thrill — see 5000 a#@es up on Washington's grasses ready for The Obamian Drill.
We must respect the other fellow's religion,
but only in the sense and to the extent that we respect his theory that his wife is beautiful and his children smart. H. L. Mencken Minority Report (1956)
For a moment horrible thoughts went through his mind:
then he remembered the nonsense about Tash and Aslan being the same and knew that the whole thing must be a cheat. C. S. Lewis The Last Battle (1956) September 24, 2009
USA is in need of a succor.
King O-Bum in U.N. — what a sucker for Progressive brigades! Bamster, stop your tirades! You do NOT speak for us, m#@$&%#@$&%r!
Circumstances and surroundings
do not make a man strong or weak, they simply reveal what he is where he is. Charles E. Woodcock A Man's Personal Service for Christ in His Life in the World (1907)
A Man can practise the Arts of Falshood and Deceit
but for a little while, before they will be discovered, and when they are discovered, they are so far from being any Advantage to him that they turn to his prejudice, and the cunning Man begins to be in a bad case, and he that was wont to over reach others, is at last caught himself. John Tillotson Sermon CVIII: The unprofitableness of Sin in this Life (1722) September 23, 2009
Scrawny Barry is having some fun
at U.N. This is just a rerun. One by one, and en masse, he has kissed every a#@, while Qaddafi applauded “his son”.
Bart: You could be my father figure.
Homer: No way. I'm not getting my finger prints on that train wreck. The Simpsons (1989) September 22, 2009
Once again, our future is hexed.
“Fight for Health” has been duly annexed. Plans of Bum The Pissant have a personal slant: legalizing illegals comes next.
Wherever there is interest and power to do wrong,
wrong will generally be done. James Madison Letters and Other Writings of James Madison:1769-1793 (1865)
Is it really true that political self-interest
is nobler somehow than economic self-interest? Milton Friedman Interview with Phil Donahue (1979) September 21, 2009
Abercrombie and Fitch have been sued.
They got lucky. They could have been booed by New Guinea-born men wanting justice, and then phallocrypts would be set to protrude...
Nothing in all the world is more dangerous
than sincere ignorance and conscientious stupidity. Martin Luther King, Jr. Strength to Love (1963) September 20, 2009
Who's “Obamo-American”? Well,
you would think it's a hard one to tell, but it's not. “Piece of s#@t” would impeccably fit — you can easily tell by the smell.
We want to create a sort of linguistic Lourdes,
where evil and misfortune are dispelled by a dip in the waters of euphemism. Robert Hughes Culture of Complaint: The Fraying of America (1993)
If it walks like s#@t
Talks like s#@t It must be s#@t If it feels like s#@t Tastes like s#@t It must be s#@t If it looks like s#@t Sounds like s#@t It must be s#@t If it smells like s#@t Tells like s#@t It must be s#@t Iggy Pop It's All S#@t (2001) September 19, 2009
All Obamian zombies and mutts!
Have you seen how your favorite putz lost his magic and charm? Have you heard the alarm? Time to duck and to cover your butts!
There are three kinds of men:
The ones that learn by reading. The few who learn by observation. The rest of them have to pee on the electric fence for themselves. Will Rogers
Blackadder: You really are as thick as clotted cream,
that's been left out by some clot, and now the clots are so clotted, you couldn't unclot them with an electric de-clotter, aren't you, Baldrick? Blackadder Back & Forth (1999) September 18, 2009
Bamster, you are no longer a hit.
You are nothing to look at. Admit: you just like being seen on the glowing screen. Like your smoking — you just can't quit.
Talk. Talk. Talk... Good lines and no action...
Said all.... Not even promising first act... Gertrude F. Atherton Black Oxen (1923)
Psychic inflation, like economic inflation,
means presenting greater values than really exist. It means that the person loves and admires himself for values for which there is no adequate foundation. Karen Horney New Ways in Psychoanalysis (1939) September 17, 2009
King O-Bum! Maybe, this would be cool
in your world, where grievances rule... We're Black and Caucasian, we're Spanish and Asian. Forty acres we want. And a mule.
It is true that Mr. Lincoln signed the Emancipation Proclamation,
after which there was a commitment to give 40 acres and a mule. That's where the argument, to this day, of reparations starts. We never got the 40 acres. We went all the way to Herbert Hoover, and we never got the 40 acres. We didn't get the mule. So we decided we'd ride this donkey as far as it would take us. Al Sharpton (2004)
Poetry is about the grief.
Politics is about the grievance. Robert Frost quoted in Roads not taken: rereading Robert Frost by Earl J. Wilcox and Jonathan N. Barron (2000) September 16, 2009
King O-Bum has been lying and stressing
the necessity for acquiescing to his lies. He forgot: he has done diddly-squat, and his failure is everyone's blessing.
He constantly feels that you owe him things
that he has done nothing to earn. Lundy Bancroft Why does he do that? Inside the minds of angry and controlling men (2003)
...his preacherly manner, which, by the way,
he has done nothing to earn, or to deserve. Marilynne Robinson Gilead (2004) September 15, 2009
Angry Bamster climbed up on the wall,
lost his balance, and ready to fall (not all votes were ACORNed, and O-Bum unadorned looks like something we want to recall).
Threescore men and threescore more,
Cannot place Humpty Dumpty as he was before. Joseph Ritson Gammer Gurton's Garland(1811) September 14, 2009
“Just a million” — this is the tally
of the March on D.C... Bamster's rally: “15,000 fakes in the Land of the Lakes.” That's the start for the proper finale.
Would it not be easier
In that case for the government To dissolve the people And elect another? Bertolt Brecht The Solution (1953)
The overwhelming majority of Americans
are possessed of two great qualities — a sense of humor and a sense of proportion. Franklin D. Roosevelt (1933) September 13, 2009
We should judge Bamster's ears by tilt.
When he lies, they are standing “as built”, but when someone defies all his obvious lies, then his ears appear to wilt.
The American people are tired of liars
and people who pretend to be something they're not. Hillary Clinton (1992) September 12, 2009
Little Barry escaped from D.C.
He did not want to hear or to see all these People who came to D.C. to proclaim from the sea to the shining old sea: “It's the time for this glorious Nation to begin the detoxification.” And the fact that The Ears ran away, it appears, is the proof of the disinclination of The Ears to listen and do what Americans hold to be true. “You were voted to serve, but you lie, and you swerve with the curve that we want to undo.” Little Barry and Air Force One left D.C. just before all this fun: all these People, who came to D.C. to proclaim their wishes, got Barry undone...
Uncle Remus: You can't run away from trouble.
There ain't no place that far. Song of the South (1946) September 11, 2009
9/11. The day we were hit,
and the day we refused to submit to legitimate fears. King O-Bum, it appears, brings these fears right back, bit by bit.
Ah, this is obviously
some strange usage of the word 'safe' that I wasn't previously aware of. Douglas Adams The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy (1979)
You can discover what your enemy fears most
by observing the means he uses to frighten you. Eric Hoffer The Passionate State of Mind (1955) September 10, 2009
“Hope” has “Changed”. It is nearly dying.
All King's men have been publicly trying dump it all on The Race (at a quickening pace, 'cause Obama was/is/will be lying).
If ever we hear a case of lying,
we must look for a severe parent. A lie would have no sense unless the truth were felt as dangerous. Alfred Adler What Life Should Mean to You (1937)
Once you begin to explain or excuse
all events on racial grounds, you begin to indulge in the perilous mythology of race. James Earl Jones Voices and Silences (1993) September 9, 2009
Disney should make some new animations
celebrating all Obaminations: “Dumb-O Hood”, “Lying King”, “Slipping Bum of the Ring”, and “One Hundred and One Machinations”.
In Postmodernism, the media validate reality.
If you don't believe this, just think how many times you've described some real event as being “just like a movie”. Brad Holland Express Yourself (1996) September 8, 2009
NEA has no frogs (live or dead).
They thought up something better instead: “Did you ask for a grant? Yes, you can! Do the rant, kiss your Bamster — and you shall be fed!” Labor Day · September 7, 2009
Labor Day. Scrawny Barry is talking
to his favorite troops. He is chalking up to them things you owe. AFL-CIO thinks you aren't supposed to be balking.
Only the mob and the elite can be attracted
by the momentum of totalitarianism itself; the masses have to be won by propaganda. Hannah Arendt The Origins of Totalitarianism (1951)
I want a working class
that can hold an election every day if they want to. William Haywood The General Strike (1911) September 6, 2009
When we speak of the “party”, the spread
of the meanings is wide, and we dread one we cannot survive: with Mad Hatter alive, but dormouse and March Hare — dead.
We had a kettle; we let it leak:
Our not repairing made it worse. We haven't had any tea for a week... The bottom is out of the Universe. Rudyard Kipling Natural Theology The Years Between (1919)
“`Then you keep moving round, I suppose?” said Alice.
“Exactly so,” said the Hatter: “as the things get used up.” Lewis Carroll Alice's Adventure in Wonderland (1865) September 5, 2009
Rahm Emanuel has been confined
to the back of Obamian mind. You should pity O-Bum who is going numb, hemorrhoid and toothache combined.
Pain is the natural consequence of wrong conduct;
any other consequence is most unnatural. To-Day (November 20, 1890)
A man sometimes stands at a crisscrossing
of the paths of his destiny, where the path of saving the world intersects with the path of his hemorrhoid. Abdul Hafeez Diwan My Hemorrhoid (2004) September 4, 2009
No more bans for the communist clan.
South Lawn is Chinese (“yes, we can!”). Barry (MFIC) cannot really see why we all are upset with his plan... September 3, 2009
Bamster just had returned from vacation.
He is ready to switch education to Obamian Voice. But the girls would want “boys” and the boys would want “Bush” in narration...
When an opponent declares,
“I will not come over to your side,” I calmly say, “Your child belongs to us already... What are you? You will pass on. Your descendants, however, now stand in the new camp. In a short time they will know nothing else but this new community.” Adolf Hitler (November 1933) quoted in The Rise and Fall of the Third Reich by William Shirer
...school teachers, taking them by and large,
are probably the most ignorant and stupid class of men in the whole group of mental workers. H. L. Mencken The Philosophy of Friedrich Nietzsche (1913) September 2, 2009
Hey, Obama! You stirred up some passion
with all things you are planning to ration. Now — see what you've done? Soon, you will be the one hating whom will become a new fashion.
The knowledge that you're alive
gives me no pleasure. Meredith Nicholson The Port of Missing Men (1907) September 1, 2009
Looking over the glorious past,
we affirm: yes, O-Bummer surpassed every man in the ring, having managed to bring ratings down so far — and so fast.
Popularity is a Crime from the Moment it is sought;
it is only a Virtue where Men have it whether they will or no. George Savile The Complete Works of George Savile (1912)
Calvin: How can something seem
so plausible at the time and so idiotic in retrospect? Calvin and Hobbes (1995) August 31, 2009
Bamster's fortune we dare to scrawl.
Winter came, brought a violent squall. Spring was sickly and gray. Summer's over today. Autumn's coming — and so is his fall.
Justice shall overtake
the artificers of lies and the false witnesses. Heraclitus Fragment 28 in Early Greek Philosophy by John Burnet (1892) August 30, 2009
Dems continue to scream and to whine.
They are looking for things to malign. They are livid because they are losing The Cause. This must be an Obaminous sign...
Sometimes life gives us lessons
sent in ridiculous packaging. Dar Williams The Pointless, Yet Poignant, Crisis Of a Co-ed (1996) August 29, 2009
Heard the news Bamster tries to suppress?
Nonsense rules — in Obamian dress — and continues to press everyone to profess the Obamian way to success.
There are certain queer times and occasions
in this strange mixed affair we call life when a man takes his whole universe for a vast practical joke. Herman Melville Moby-Dick: Or, The Whale (1851)
It is discouraging to think
how many people are shocked by honesty and how few by deceit. Noël Coward Blithe Spirit (1941) August 28, 2009
Internet was created to stand
up to nuclear hits to this land, so the messages would get to your neighborhood, even when it no longer looks grand... Like right now... The nuclear hit was replaced with this Kenyan twit, who has managed to break all he touched — yes, a fake, but he acts as if he is legit. Internet helped this fake get elected. Now, he has a way to perfect it by appending a switch, On and Off... Stupid b#@ch, does he think we will let him direct it?
In cyberspace,
the First Amendment is a local ordinance. John Perry Barlow Leaving the Physical World (1991)
All forms of government ultimately
are not going to succeed in trying to control or censor the Internet. Rupert Murdoch in Murdoch's New Groove (2006) August 27, 2009
“Dear Teddy, may God rest your soul.”
But He won't. No reason at all. Known traitor, a slut, and a murderer. But — Yuri's waiting, in Hell. Don't stall.
...when he shall die,
Take him and cut him out in little stars, And he will make the face of heaven so fine That all the world will be in love with night And pay no worship to the garish sun. William Shakespeare Romeo and Juliet (1597)
Take him and cut him out in little stars,
Which can be used to mark and rate the bars. OBAMAFU editorial comment
...You'll have to decide
Whether Judas Iscariot Had God on his side. Bob Dylan With God on Our Side (1963) August 26, 2009
All good news are so easy to smother...
Someone spoke of “last Kennedy brother”, and we thought we'd puke, but we didn't rebuke. We rejoiced: he said “last”, not “another”.
He wanted to be his brother's brother, and then
he turned that torch over last year to Barack Obama. <...> Barack is now the last brother. Chris Matthews(MSNBC) Today Show, August 26, 2009
The reason so many people turned up
at his funeral is this: they wanted to make sure he was dead. Samuel Goldwyn August 25, 2009
Rahm Emanuel's moves, at a glance,
did not make it, and failed to advance King O-Bum's reputation all around the nation. So, just dance, ballerina, just dance...
So on with your career,
you can't afford a backward glance. Nat King Cole Dance, ballerina, dance (1957) August 24, 2009
Bamster stopped printing Cash for your Clunkers.
Go back to your trenches and bunkers. Keep your old SUV — it will do. C'est la vie — goes bust after going bonkers.
Patience is the ability to idle your motor
when you feel like stripping your gears. Roger Copsey in Boy's Life (1955)
A masterly retreat is in itself a victory.
Henry Wadsworth Longfellow in Life of Henry Wadsworth Longfellow by Samuel Longfellow (1891) August 23, 2009
Looking forward to new institutions,
pushed by Bamster's unneeded solutions, we propose just one more: All-Obamian Corps For Collecting Unpaid Restitutions.
There is only one post fit for you,
and that is the office of perpetual president of the Heaven and Hell Amalgamation Society. Thomas Carlyle quoted in The Life, Letters, and Friendships of Richard Monckton Milnes by T. Wemyss Reid (1890)
While the rest of the country waves the flag of Americana,
we understand we are not part of that. We don't owe America anything — America owes us. Al Sharpton August 22, 2009
Axelrod and Emanuel (Rahm)
will be blamed for O-Bum being dumb. So, they should have returned to the roles they have learned: Tweedledee and his pal, Tweedledum.
They're lying low and they're makin' hay
They seem determined to go all the way Bob Dylan Tweedle Dee & Tweedle Dum (2001)
‘I know what you're thinking about,’
said Tweedledum: ‘but it isn't so, nohow.’ ‘Contrariwise,’ continued Tweedledee, ‘if it was so, it might be; and if it were so, it would be; but as it isn't, it ain't. That's logic.‘ Lewis Carroll Through the Looking Glass (1872) August 21, 2009
Barry, you are a crybaby; thus,
always ready to whine. Making fuss in your Wee-Wee'd address would be helped by a dress. Send your size — and the dress is on us.
Sure, the lion is king of the jungle,
but airdrop him into Antarctica, and he's just a penguin's b#@ch. Dennis Miller August 20, 2009
In campaigns, propped by ACORN, your score
has been shown to roar and soar, but by now, your mug doesn't look half as smug. You are popular, Bamster, no more.
His success has the life expectancy
of a small boy who is about to look into a gas tank with a lighted match. Fred Allen Much Ado About Me (1956)
...fated to co-habit
on uneasy terms with his Image... W. H. Auden Unpredictable But Providential (1972) August 19, 2009
King Obama crawled up to the throne,
propped by many, but he is alone in assuming we all will deliver his goal. Stop your schpiels — face the music, cabrón!
The ignorant mind, with its infinite afflictions,
passions, and evils, is rooted in the three poisons. Greed, anger, and delusion. Bodhidharma Breakthrough Sermon August 18, 2009
Words are clear, but there is a cloud
of Obamolinguistical doubt. “Give me back my U.S!” (as “before all this mess”...) Is it racist to say this aloud?
Why hate someone for the color of their skin
when there are much better reasons to hate them? Denis Leary
I believe that political correctness
can be a form of linguistic fascism, and it sends shivers down the spine of my generation who went to war against fascism. P. D. James August 17, 2009
We support, now popular, wishes
for ideas that Bamster still dishes out, frightening some. Our message to Bum: “Your DeathCare will sleep with the fishes.”
The problem is not whether you can see
the handwriting on the wall, but whether you can read it. Evan Esar 20000 Quips and Quotes (1968) August 16, 2009
There once was a man named Obama.
War abroad was no longer a drama in his media plan. There was no Taliban: it was swallowed by Telebama.
I think television has betrayed
the meaning of democratic speech, adding visual chaos to the confusion of voices. What role does silence have in all this noise? Federico Fellini in I'm a Born Liar: A Fellini Lexicon ed. by Damian Pettigrew (2003) August 15, 2009
On the White House lawn, excuses
fly as thick as they do in the news. Is garden, tainted with lead, still organic, if fed with BS that Obama produces?
All of this was well-meaning bulls#@t,
but bulls#@t is still bulls#@t and will never be mistaken for McDonald's Secret Sauce. Stephen King Danse Macabre (1983) August 14, 2009
“Bamster won't unplug your Grandmother.”
Double negative? Well, if you bother to unwrap this negation in a proper formation, it may get you to think he'd rather... — ??? NO! This would imply that we say... We're not going there. No way.
Halley Reed: He's an American phenomenon.
Clifford Stern: Yeah, like acid rain. Crimes and Misdemeanors (1989)
My grandmother's brain was dead,
but her heart was still beating. It was the first time we ever had a Democrat in the family. Emo Philips (1985) August 13, 2009
CDC says we ought to eat less.
We agree, but would like to digress: starving Africans need all this food. We will feed most of them, through the Bamster's largess.
Why should we take up farming when there are
so many mongongo nuts in the world? African bushman, quoted by Jared Diamond Discover, May 1987
The first lesson of economics is scarcity:
there is never enough of anything to satisfy all those who want it. The first lesson of politics is to disregard the first lesson of economics. Thomas Sowell Is Reality Optional?: And Other Essays (1993) August 12, 2009
Is Obama the curse or the cure?
Well... solutions he claims to procure hurt both poor and rich, and the poor will b#@ch, while the rich will be forced to be poor.
I am for doing good to the poor,
but I differ in opinion of the means. I think the best way of doing good to the poor, is not making them easy in poverty, but leading or driving them out of it. Benjamin Franklin, William Temple Franklin Memoirs of the life and writings of Benjamin Franklin, Vol.4 (1809)
To take from one because it is thought
that his own industry and that of his father's has acquired too much, in order to spare to others, who, or whose fathers have not exercised equal industry and skill, is to violate arbitrarily the first principle of association — the guarantee to every one of a free exercise of his industry and the fruits acquired by it. Thomas Jefferson Note in Destutt Tracy's Political Economy (1816) August 11, 2009
Bamster's ears are starting to droop.
You can see it without a loupe. They are withering forth to the South and North, wreaking havoc on most of his troop.
If you play a sport where your ears may be damaged,
it is important to do all you can to protect them. Carol Ballard Ears (2009)
But it is remarkable, that the drooping of the ears,
though probably the effect of disuse, is not accompanied by any decrease in size. Charles Darwin The variation of animals and plants under domestication, Vol. 2 (1868) August 10, 2009
Hey, Obama! You are a disgrace
to the President's job, and your face has the look of a shill. This is why voters will vote your a#@ far away from your place.
When you get to be President,
there are all those things, the honors, the twenty-one gun salutes, all those things, you have to remember it isn't for you. It's for the Presidency. Harry S. Truman in Plain Speaking: An Oral Biography of Harry S. Truman by Merle Miller (1973)
Fraus est celare fraudem.
[Latin, “It is fraud to conceal a fraud.”] Gentleman of the Middle Temple The grounds and rudiments of law and equity, alphabetically digested (1751) August 9, 2009
Our losses are hard to recoup —
Bamster tricked every gullible dupe. Well, Barack — see the fizz? Yes, Barack, here it is: we have proudly p#@$ed in your soup.
A small revenge is humaner
than no revenge at all. Friedrich Nietzsche Thus Spake Zarathustra (1891) August 8, 2009
There is now a Joker-faced poster
of Obama. This image does foster the portrayal we feel does not try to conceal the collapse of O-Bum's rollercoaster.
Hustlers of the world,
there is one Mark you cannot beat: the Mark inside... William S. Burroughs Naked Lunch (1959) August 7, 2009
Hey, Obama! The mob from your coop
is about to enter the loop. There will be some poop for the masses to scoop, and it all will end up in your soup.
Omen, n. A sign that something will happen
if nothing happens. Ambrose Bierce The Devil's Dictionary (1911)
The American people are a very generous people
and will forgive almost any weakness, with the possible exception of stupidity. Will Rogers The Illiterate Digest (1924) August 6, 2009
King Barack is a Big-Eared Idiot.
So, Barack is a Big-Eared Idiot. Say it twice — no harm. Third time, though, is the charm: Yes — Barack is a Big-Eared Idiot.
Maybe somebody ought to write
a book about Obama. It could be called: Barack Obama is a Big-Eared Idiot. I'll bet the libs would love that! Rush Limbaugh Obama Becomes a Caricature (August 4, 2009)
...the presence of an idiot
often becomes a source of real danger. Frederic Bateman The Idiot; His Place in Creation, and His Claims on Society (1897) August 5, 2009
King Obama, upset by his glitches,
is inviting his rats and his snitches to report each event of intent to dissent. Should we try to locate all these b#@ches?
It is cheering to see that the rats
are still around — the ship is not sinking. Eric Hoffer Reflections on the human condition (1973)
Whenever there has been talk
of exterminating rats, others, who were not rats, have been exterminated. Günter Grass The Rat (1989) August 4, 2009
Hey, O-Bum! You are nothing — a fruit
of your mother's relentless pursuit of a life with a man, who was part of The Plan that would give her The Meaning, to boot. So unfortunate you must've been, leading life where wealth was a sin, growing up to abhor every instance of “more”, knowing well that your nearest kin by depravity grew to enslave kids and selves, to a mob, to a wave of the human distress, every instance of “less” taken in as the sign of the brave — which it wasn't. But this was your guide, and you went far enough to divide our life into two: Black and White, Red and Blue. Great Divider you are. What a ride... Hey, Obama! We wish you the most of the worst you can think of. The cost of your deeds in our land will be paid by your band — “hell to pay” is the gist of this toast.
Obama's birthday is a reminder of
why healthcare is so important. As you probably know, due to a lack of healthcare coverage, Obama's mother was turned away from a number of hospitals and was ultimately forced to give birth in a manger. Jimmy Kimmel Jimmy Kimmel Live (August 4, 2009)
If you had a million years to do it in,
you couldn't rub out even half the “F#@k you” signs in the world. J. D. Salinger The Catcher in The Rye (1951) August 3, 2009
King O-Bum got himself consiglieri,
those who could be unstoppable, very. They were finally stopped, and his Ears had flopped when his fairies had failed Little Barry. August 2, 2009
Mr. Holder to our nation:
“You are cowards.” Eternal damnation is the proper reward for these words of Bum's ward who's the Warden of Obamanation. August 1, 2009
Hey, Obama! While praising your ponies,
Larry Flynt didn't fall for your cronies. And he thinks that you suck, and it ain't your luck: he just thinks that you have no cojones.
The morals of a baboon
and the guts of a butterfly. Truman Capote in “Capote” by Gerald Clarke (1988)
He was just a coward and that was
the worst luck any man could have. Ernest Hemingway For Whom the Bell Tolls (1940) July 31, 2009
There once was one doctor Fukino.
A concern over Uno Bambino with no papers in sight made her feel she is right fixing odds for the POTUS casino.
As for the law — it catered for a human nature
of which it took a naturally low view. John Galsworthy The Forsyte Saga (1906 – 1922) July 30, 2009
There is something around the eyes
of Obama in every disguise: something tired, unclean (caffeine? nicotine?), and a shade of the darkening skies.
He bears an unmistakable resemblance
to a cornered rat. Norman Mailer Advertisements for myself (1959)
There are more disorders of the mind than of the body,
and they are of a more dangerous nature. Cicero The Tusculan Disputations (c.45 B.C.) July 29, 2009
Captain Hook is still there. His letter
names it all: from the plank to the fetter. Some may wish to enlist. We prefer to resist. We are ready — the sooner, the better.
I hold it to be the inalienable right of anybody
to go to hell in his own way. Robert Frost Speech, Berkeley, California (1935)
You may either win your peace or buy it:
win it, by resistance to evil; buy it, by compromise with evil. John Ruskin The Two Paths (1859) July 28, 2009
King O-Bum, for attacking your doctor,
gets a title of “Omnidestructor”. He has ruined your wealth, and he targets your health with the help of a government proctor. King O-Bum isn't one of your friends. This is when your complacency ends: when O-Bum will decide whether saving your hide will be worthy of money he spends.
For in reason, all government without the consent
of the governed is the very definition of slavery. Jonathan Swift The Drapier's Letters (1724 – 1725) Letter IV: A Letter to the Whole People of Ireland
No man is great enough or wise enough
for any of us to surrender our destiny to. Henry Miller The Wisdom of the Heart (1941) July 27, 2009
Placing all further plans in distress,
first, Obama repaid the largess of the Union f#@$s, using Stimulus Bucks. A strategic mistake, no less.
Nobody would dare stop
the first thing he was going to do. He was in his honeymoon, the first black president, historical and all that. Rush Limbaugh Obama on Edge as Magic Fades (July 22, 2009) July 26, 2009
Mingling freely with junior Gods,
Bamster's czars, Bamster's goons, Bamster's squads bet that folks in distress will demolish U.S. Now, what do you think are the odds?
Scire, deos quoniam propius contingis, oportet.
[Latin, “You live so near the gods, you're sure to know.”] Horace Satires (c.35 – 30 B.C.) July 25, 2009
King Barack had dysfunctional ears
which were fanning his innermost fears: every time someone spoke of the matters baroque, he would instantly break into tears.
It is the slowest yet the daintiest sense;
For even the Ears of such as have no skill, Perceive a discord, and conceive offence; And knowing not what is good, yet find the ill. John Davies Nosce Teipsum (1599)
But what is the good of still soothing
the delicate ears of our modern effeminates? Friedrich Nietzsche On the Genealogy of Morals (1887) July 24, 2009
Bamster, you've created a drama:
Mr. Gates and James Crowley's mama (who was quickly replaced by your babble on race)... Who is stupid? Barack H. Obama.
Just being a Negro doesn't qualify you
to understand the race situation any more than being sick makes you an expert on medicine. Dick Gregory Nigger: An Autobiography (1990)
Ray: Remember what they used to call me in the joint?
Benny: What? Ray: The brain! Benny: Noo, that was sarcastic! Small Time Crooks (2000) July 23, 2009
Thailand has a town called Phuket.
All broadcasters were trying to duck it. They were very aware of this trap ON the air. Most of them simply couldn't unlock it. Plans to stop next Iranian rocket were announced in the town of Phuket. Mrs. Clinton went there when O-Bum, OFF the air, used the word for her special docket.
The Dude: Ah, f#@k it.
The Big Lebowski: F#@k it! Yes! That's your answer. That's your answer for everything! Tattoo it on your forehead! The Big Lebowski (1998) July 22, 2009
King Obama has gotten his clue
when he heard of the “new Waterloo”. When Napoleon heard of Obama The T#@d, he was ready to rise and to sue.
Marcus Vindictus: Don't you know your right flank from your left flank?
Captain Mucus: I'm sorry sir, I flunked flank. Marcus Vindictus: You flunked flank? Get the flunk out of here! History of the World: Part I (1981) July 21, 2009
We are not analyzing the score
or the people we hate (or adore). Our country is stuck, thanks to stupid Barack... “Better than” doesn't cut it no more.
A USA Today/Gallup survey suggested
that six months into Obama's presidency, his popularity was lower than George W. Bush's at the same stage of his tenure. Telegraph.Co.UK (July 21, 2009)
Patriotism is usually stronger than class hatred,
and always stronger than internationalism. George Orwell England Your England (1941) July 20, 2009
From a void, as all expert magicians,
King O-Bum, to fulfill his ambitions, is creating new czars (a.k.a. commissars). EPA should curtail these emissions.
All governments suffer a recurring problem:
Power attracts pathological personalities. It is not that power corrupts but that it is magnetic to the corruptible. Frank Herbert Chapterhouse Dune (1985) July 19, 2009
Foundations of all Obamology
must be rooted in psychopathology. Bamster has every trait of the state we equate with the subject of pure scatology. July 18, 2009
Every communist b#@ch must be scared
of the coming payback, if she dared think of things that she dreads as she serves all these Reds... We can tell: she'll be unprepared.
V: Certainly there are those
who are more responsible than others, and they will be held accountable. V for Vendetta (2005)
Morticia: And our credo:
“Sic gorgiamus allos subjectatos nunc.” We gladly feast on those who would subdue us. Not just pretty words. The Addams Family (1991) July 17, 2009
We can't argue about a state
built by proles for proles — so great is the concept of zoos which are run by the crews which are staffed with the beasts by the Fate...
Democracy is the art and science
of running the circus from the monkey cage. H. L. Mencken Chrestomathy (1949)
No plan can prevent a stupid person from doing
the wrong thing in the wrong place at the wrong time — but a good plan should keep a concentration from forming. Charles E. Wilson July 16, 2009
This is what we have said long ago,
long before Bamster's ratings fell low: there is no way in hell we would wait till they fell. Bamster, Reid and Pelosi must go.
Persistent prophecy is a familiar way
of assuring the event. George Gissing The Private Papers of Henry Ryecroft (1918)
Sideshow Bob: Homer, how can one man have so many enemies?
Homer: I'm a people person. The Simpsons (1989) July 15, 2009
Bamster's crew has been purging the links
to the few of most damaging things, scrubbing all Worldwide Web clean. A power ebb has began. Bamster blinked — and he stinks...
If all records told the same tale —
then the lie passed into history and became truth. George Orwell Nineteen Eighty-Four (1949)
Postmodernists believe that truth is myth, and myth, truth.
This equation has its roots in pop psychology. The same people also believe that emotions are a form of reality. There used to be another name for this state of mind. It used to be called psychosis. Brad Holland Express Yourself (1996) July 14, 2009
Our country continues to lurch...
Search and seizure? Let's start with the search. We will give you the scoop, so you stay in the loop, getting Bamster away from his perch.
You uncover what is
when you get rid of what isn't. R. Buckminster Fuller in “Bucky Fuller's Global Game” by Phyllis Theroux, Washington Post (July 19, 1982)
People are usually more convinced by reasons
they discovered themselves than by those found by others. Blaise Pascal July 13, 2009
There once was a mandrill Obama.
He was born in the zoo, and his mama liked this popular name. All zoo visitors came to regard him as Real Obama. He IS real — BC and all shots (not like some reprehensible putz...) — but “the public” complained, citing passions ingrained... We are busy connecting the dots.
Calvin: I'd say that crossed the line
from Ironic Coincidence to Evil Omen. Calvin and Hobbes (1990) July 12, 2009
We were thinking that Egypt should sell
us two pyramids: one for Michelle, and another for Bamster. We could buy them a dumpster, but we think they would not take it well... Then, there is a contingency action: we could buy Lenin's Tomb for a fraction of its cost, just in time. Brother, spare a dime! We will spend it to your satisfaction.
If I need a cause for celebration
Or a comfort I can use to ease my mind I rely on my imagination And I dream of an imaginary time. Billy Joel Everybody has a dream (1998) July 11, 2009
Bamster met with Medvedev and Putin,
all in private. Them Russians were mutin' every sound he made, just in case if he strayed, but he didn't — was busy salutin'... Bamster thought that them Russians are kind — not a match for his devious mind... But he managed to fail: now, Dmitry's blackmail shoves their rockets up Bamster's behind. On to Italy. Meeting the Pope, who was possibly thinking: The Dope may repent and confess all his sins to the press, once he gets to the end of his rope... Then he went to the country of Ghana. They played drums (no one there plays piano). What a nice neighborhood! He could move! Yes — he could organize their Pax Africana!...
The way I understand it, the Russians are
sort of a combination of evil and incompetence... sort of like the Post Office with tanks. Emo Phillips July 10, 2009
Everywhere O-Bummer arrives,
his distaste for U.S. still survives. Bamster, if it's so bad, move to f#@$ing Baghdad — this will fix our “cheerless” lives.
I know that in the past the U.S.
has sometimes failed to meet its responsibilities so let me make it clear those days are over. Barack Obama G8 summit, L'Aquila, Italy (July 9, 2009) July 9, 2009
Just one hundred and seventy days —
and O-Bum is no longer a craze, but just one stupid dude... and we are being screwed in one hundred and seventy ways.
If the whole human race lay in one grave,
the epitaph on its headstone might well be: “It seemed a good idea at the time.” Rebecca West The New York Times (October 2, 1977) July 8, 2009
We have lived through the plague and the blight.
Now you see Bamster's vultures in flight. They're circling above eying things that you love. Make them pay for it dearly — fight!
Now nobody get nervous, you ain't got nothing to fear.
You're being robbed by the John Dillinger Gang, that's the best there is! John Dillinger in Dillinger (1973) July 7, 2009
Listen, Bamster: we thought you were smarter.
You are not. So, we offer a starter: Constitution is here. We will not let you near. Go away — we'll stop. That's the barter.
No terms except unconditional and immediate surrender
can be accepted. I propose to move immediately upon your works. Ulysses S. Grant Battle of Fort Donelson (1862)
Ronnie Wingate: Excuse me bro',
but who the f#@k are you? Chili Palmer: I'm the one tellin' you how it is... Get Shorty (1995) July 6, 2009
Fish are swimming — because of O-Bum!
Birds are singing — because of O-Bum! Sun is shining on us, as we get on the bus — on the bus that belongs to O-Bum...
There he goes. One of God's own prototypes.
Some kind of high powered mutant never even considered for mass production. Too weird to live, and too rare to die. Hunter S. Thompson Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas (1972) July 5, 2009
O say, can you see from afar
how Bamster is acting bizarre in appointing his czars to all roles in his farce? We should stock up on feathers and tar.
Hegel remarks somewhere that all great world-historic facts
and personages appear, so to speak, twice. He forgot to add: the first time as tragedy, the second time as farce. Karl Marx The 18th Brumaire of Louis Bonaparte (1852) Independence Day · July 4, 2009
Pigs are very unlikely to fly.
In four years, you will know why. We will patiently wait for a happier date: “Twenty Thirteen, The Fourth of July”.
The Statue of Liberty is no longer saying,
“Give me your poor, your tired, your huddled masses.” She's got a baseball bat and yelling, “You want a piece of me?” Robin Williams Live on Broadway (2002)
Nothing baffles the schemes of evil people so much
as the calm composure of great souls. Comte de Mirabeau National Tea Party · July 3, 2009
Cap and Trade? Listen, Bamster: we swear
by our soil, our water, our air, that our patience has snapped. If you will have us capped, you can bet: we will trade you — right there.
The idea that “the public interest” supersedes
private interests and rights can have but one meaning: that the interests and rights of some individuals take precedence over the interests and rights of others. Ayn Rand The Pull Peddlers (1966) July 2, 2009
There once was a dummy named Gibbs,
whose performance was tied to his lips. But his brain was attached to his a#@, and they matched, thus creating a total eclipse.
He can compress the most words
into the smallest ideas of any man I ever met. Abraham Lincoln in Lincoln The Lawyer by Frederick Trevor Hill (1906) July 1, 2009
Listen, Bamster: in your “townhall”,
attendees are like whores-on-call. But the day will arrive when we ditch all your jive and regain our freedom for all.
It is the ever-new embodiment of the old fable
of the sale of the soul to the Devil. The tempter offers wealth, comfort, excitement, but in return the victim must sell her soul, nor does the other party forget to exact his due to the uttermost farthing. William Booth In Darkest England and the Way Out (1890) June 30, 2009
Bamster
does it again and again —
still campaigning, and now his campaign really gets in the way... Time to stop it. Just say: “You will NOT — we will NOT, scatterbrain! ”
Big Brother isn't watching.
He's singing and dancing. He's pulling rabbits out of a hat. Big Brother's busy holding your attention every moment you're awake. He's making sure you're always distracted. He's making sure you're fully absorbed. Chuck Palahniuk Lullaby (2002)
To knock a thing down,
especially if it is cocked at an arrogant angle, is a deep delight of the blood. George Santayana Reason in Society (1905) June 29, 2009
Hey, Obama! You are a jackass!
People are very angry — en masse. NO, you won't — because NO, we won't, of course, let your a#@ reach its critical mass.
Such men as he be never at heart's ease
Whiles they behold a greater than themselves, And therefore are they very dangerous. William Shakespeare Julius Caesar (1599) June 28, 2009
Disobedience can be quite civil
and is useful for fighting this evil. Not a drop, not a crumb, not a penny for Bum — and with time, he'll wither and shrivel.
History says that wherever
a weak and ignorant people possess a thing which a strong and enlightened people want, it must be yielded up peaceably. Mark Twain Pudd'nhead Wilson's New Calendar (1897)
Disobedience, the rarest and most courageous of the virtues,
is seldom distinguished from neglect, the laziest and commonest of the vices. George Bernard Shaw Maxims for Revolutionists (1903) June 27, 2009
Your mentality, Afrocolonial,
by itself is a good testimonial, that your “love” for U.S. is a pure BS even when it is made ceremonial.
Political tags — such as royalist, communist,
democrat, populist, fascist, liberal, conservative, and so forth — are never basic criteria. The human race divides politically into those who want people to be controlled and those who have no such desire. Robert A. Heinlein The Notebooks of Lazarus Long (1978)
Man's task is... to become conscious of the contents
that press upward from the unconscious. Carl Jung Memories, Dreams, Reflections (1963) June 26, 2009
There once was a fellow named Gandhi.
His advice now comes very handy: no violence — none. Don't cringe. Don't run. Just say “No”, and ignore the candy...
Civil disobedience becomes a sacred duty
when the state has become lawless or corrupt. And a citizen who barters with such a state shares in its corruption and lawlessness... Every citizen is responsible for every act of his government... There is only one sovereign remedy, namely, non-violent non-cooperation. Mohandas Gandhi Young India (January 5, 1922)
Stand still... And refuse to retreat.
Look at it as God looks at it and draw upon His power to hold up under the blast. Charles R. Swindoll Starting Over: Fresh Hope for the Road Ahead (1983) June 25, 2009
Bamster fixed our cars, our banks,
our taxes and jobs, and he hangs over us... We are hexed. Our health will be next! Bum-fumb-duckery? Thanks, but no thanks!
It is in the nature of the men
handling the apparatus of compulsion and coercion to overrate its power to work, and to strive at subduing all spheres of human life to its immediate influence. Ludwig von Mises Omnipotent government (1944) June 24, 2009
Bamster is a disease — we agree —
grown to a pandemic degree... We are welcoming time when, in frivolous rhyme, we'll report our land Bamster-free.
Man's deadliest weapon is language.
He is as susceptible to being hypnotized by slogans as he is to infectious diseases. And where there is an epidemic, the group-mind takes over. Arthur Koestler Janus: A Summing Up (1978)
If he is not the image of God,
then he is a disease of the dust. Gilbert K. Chesterton Wine When it is Red (1908) June 23, 2009
We are focused on dissing Barack.
He is simply a radical schmuck, who was given a job to provide for the mob and deliver their dream — with a buck. June 22, 2009
As we move through these turbulent times
full of ills, misdemeanors and crimes, we are sure: ill will of O-Bummer will still burn his Ears by our rhymes.
The supreme art of war is
to subdue the enemy without fighting. Sun Tzu The Art of War (c.6th century B.C.) June 21, 2009
Listen, Bamster! Keep saying “I can” —
soon enough you'll find that your plan doesn't work in the void and you can't avoid hearing back:“No, YOU can't. WE can.”
Our major obligation is not to mistake
slogans for solutions. Edward R. Murrow In Search of Light (1967) June 20, 2009
Don't be scared of Bamster! The threat
is quite real, but don't forget: in about two years, voters will crop his Ears, thus obtaining a suitable pet.
No more good must be attempted
than the nation can bear. Thomas Jefferson Letter to Dr. Walter Jones (1801)
Crises have a way of thrusting into the limelight
hitherto obscure persons, and giving them, for a long or short period, a leading role. Susan Ertz After Noon (1926) June 19, 2009
No, Obama is not from Nantucket,
but from Kenya. Let's not knock it. Simply tell him: “You suck, and regardless of luck, you will have to continue to suck it...”
If at first you don't succeed,
failure may be your style. Quentin Crisp in Quentin Crisp by Tim Fountain (2002)
It is but human nature to hate the man
whom you have hurt. Tacitus Dialogus Agricola and Germania (1908) June 18, 2009
We have visited Mount Rushmore
to partake of American lore. Next to Washington's face we have noted a trace of O-Bum... So, we looked for some more, and right next to the entrance we saw a peculiar truck. On the floor of the trailer — O-Head and O-Bust... and we said: “What a perfect setup! But what for?”
On June 18th, one of our reporters visited Mount Rushmore, where he identified a sketch of Bamster's face already carved into the rock (see an unaltered photograph below, with the mentioned sketch appropriately marked in a light shade of red).
And then our reporter witnessed something else.
All pictures below were taken at the entrance to the Mount Rushmore monument and at the National Presidential Wax Museum (at the base of Mount Rushmore), on June 18, 2009, between 2 and 2:30 PM. Bamster's headless bust and Bamster's head on a trailer looked very well separated.
Please note the conspicuous absence of the presidential mole on the left side of the face (Joseph Stalin, whose face was disfigured by a smallpox, has baby skin on ALL paintings and ALL — of course, retouched... — photographs).
Have we witnessed a tryout of sorts? Nnah... They said this piece of junk was on a promotional tour, on its way to the Presidents Park.
There is a statue of limitation.
Samuel Goldwyn June 17, 2009
Ratings sink, and the pollsters are timid.
Planning chaos, Bum dared to scheme it as a blitzkrieg, dumbs#@t... Bum, it's time to admit: every man has to know his limit.
History does not long entrust the care
of freedom to the weak or the timid. Dwight D. Eisenhower First Inaugural Address (1953) June 16, 2009
There are various rumors and lies,
but we have to believe our eyes: executing the kill, Bamster shows his skill... King O-Bum is The Lord of the Flies.
But how, if that fly had a father and mother?
How would he hang his slender gilded wings, And buzz lamenting doings in the air! Poor harmless fly, That, with his pretty buzzing melody, Came here to make us merry! And thou hast kill'd him. William Shakespeare Titus Andronicus (1593) June 15, 2009
No, the Healthcare bill won't pass.
Even Bamster would know: his a#@ is so stressed, that the force from additional source of malfunctions will bust it, alas...
The field of consciousness is tiny.
It accepts only one problem at a time. Antoine de Saint-Exupéry Flight to Arras (1942) June 14, 2009
In a village, located in Kenya,
people suffer from megalomania. Their idiot, Bum, has been missing. He swam to U.S. (or, they say, Transylvania)...
Bugs Bunny: Yeah, well, you see,
I just want to call me travel agency. They've routed me off me route. Transylvania 6-5000 (1963)
For the neurotic, the desire for pleasure
is the desire to escape from reality. Nathaniel Branden The Psychology of Pleasure (1964) June 13, 2009
Things are truly beginning to stink.
Time to rise. Time to say what we think. Time to get what we want, time to push and to taunt every scumbag, bright Red or just Pink.
This republic was not established by cowards;
and cowards will not preserve it. Elmer Davis But we were born free (1954)
We have room for but one flag, the American flag,
and this excludes the red flag, which symbolizes all wars against liberty and civilization, just as much as it excludes any foreign flag of a nation to which we are hostile... Theodore Roosevelt Letter to the American Defense Society (1919) June 12, 2009
Bamster's crew peddles us their wares.
Stuff is worthless, and nobody cares. Soon, this madness will stop. Then we shove every prop they had used, right up his and up theirs.
During his office, treason was no crime.
The sons of Belial had a glorious time. John Dryden Absalom and Achitophel (1681) June 11, 2009
We enjoy seeing signs of the tide:
Bamster starting to slip and to slide, zombies starting to think, people starting to drink to the failure of Bamster, worldwide.
I think we consider too much
the good luck of the early bird and not enough the bad luck of the early worm. Franklin D. Roosevelt in Franklin D. Roosevelt by Frank Burt Freidel (1952)
No matter how great your triumphs
or how tragic your defeats — approximately 1.5 billion Chinese couldn't care less. Lazlo's Chinese Relativity Axiom June 10, 2009
There once was one Reverend Wright.
He screamed out his brains every night how he hated U.S. But O-Bum, nonetheless, kept his friendship with Reverend tight. Then O-Bum got elected (oh, dear...). To protect his untouchable rear, he allowed “them Jews” (yep, that's Wright, in the news) to control the access to The Ear...
The minister had not set out to be a traitor.
He had merely put his ambitions before his integrity, and circumstances had done the rest. Victor O'Reilly Games of the Hangman (1991) June 9, 2009
Looks like Bamster is sort of a test,
and by Jove, we shall do our best. We shall call, unafraid, every spade — just a spade. That's the least we can do to protest...
A whole page of learned polysyllables may not
convey as much as the statement that a certain woman is a b#@ch, or that a certain man is a jerk. Eric Berne Games people play (1964)
The true test of character is not
how much we know how to do, but how we behave when we don't know what to do. John W. Holt, Jr. June 8, 2009
Our leader has pledged his support
in defense of Islam. We report: Arafat had expired; then Bin Laden was fired; now, Bamster is holding the fort...
There are historic situations in which refusal
to defend the inheritance of a civilization, however imperfect, against tyranny and aggression may result in consequences even worse than war. Reinhold Niebuhr Christian Faith and the World Crisis (1941)
A word carries far — very far —
deals destruction through time as the bullets go flying through space. Joseph Conrad Lord Jim (1900) June 7, 2009
How desperate have we become
to accept leadership of O-Bum! Of all things Kafkaesque, this one feels most grotesque: being led by the Communist scum!
Characteristics of a popular politician:
a horrible voice, bad breeding, and a vulgar manner. Aristophanes Knights (424 B.C.)
If he stops smoking,
we will hit three out of three. OBAMAFU editorial comment June 6, 2009
Overdue for a change of regime,
we would like to reclaim self-esteem, which was taken from us by Barack the Bumass. All we need is a vote and a dream...
The task of weaning various people and groups
from the national nipple will not be easy. The sound of whines, bawls, screams and invective will fill the air as the agony of withdrawal pangs finds voice. Linda Bowles The Weaning Process (1994)
Those who stay away from the election
think that one vote will do no good: 'Tis but one step more to think one vote will do no harm. Ralph Waldo Emerson Journals (1912) June 5, 2009
No, Obama is not from Nantucket
(that's entirely different docket...), but, by picking a judge with a racial grudge, he is asking for it — let him suck it!...
We should have been expecting it.
You tangle with a foot-long cockroach and live through it, naturally you have to expect a giant lizard with three tits to come along sooner or later. Spider Robinson Callahan's Legacy (1996) June 4, 2009
“The Islam”, Bamster tried to insist,
“had created and made to exist compass, printing and pen...” Could be? Maybe... but then, now Chinese must be really p#@$ed ... What Islam has to do with the pen? Or the compass? Or printing? Or then, should we say “That's enough. Let's count the stuff Jews and Christians gave us.”? Amen...
It was Islam — at places like Al-Azhar — that carried
the light of learning through so many centuries, paving the way for Europe's Renaissance and Enlightenment. It was innovation in Muslim communities that developed the order of algebra; our magnetic compass and tools of navigation; our mastery of pens and printing... Barack Obama Cairo, Egypt (June 4, 2009)
All people know the same truth.
Our lives consist of how we chose to distort it. Deconstructing Harry (1997) June 3, 2009
Muslims now can truly rejoice.
Bamster lends them his beautiful voice, and instead of Osama, they are getting Obama as an almost identical choice.
If you actually took the number of Muslim Americans,
we'd be one of the largest Muslim countries in the world. Barack Obama Interview to French TV (June 1, 2009)
In the animal kingdom, the rule is, eat or be eaten;
in the human kingdom, define or be defined. Thomas Szasz The Second Sin (1973) June 2, 2009
There once was a man named Obama,
who was constantly missing his mama. She's no longer with us, but when we need to cuss, we've got a good word for Obama.
Jocasta (Oedipus' mother): I hate to tell you
what they call my son in Harlem. Mighty Aphrodite (1995)
Dog Psychiatrist: He has other problems.
I believe he suffers from nipple anxiety. Probably, came from a nine-dog litter. Down and Out in Beverly Hills (1986) June 1, 2009
There once was one Sotomayor.
Bamster chose her to even the score: racist bigoted b#@ch with agenda to pitch... Let's hope she'll be shown the door.
There is no bigotry like that
of “free thought“ run to seed. Horace Greeley in A Dictionary of Thoughts by Tryon Edwards
And in a groundbreaking moment of scientific discovery,
it just recently was determined that Latina women — and not white men — are best suited for jobs as judges. White men simply don't have the empathy that Latina women possess, and judges require empathy to decide on important cases. It is still unclear if empathy is an inherited trait, and one that Latina women are born with, or if it is something the Latina comes to possess through her unique and rich life experiences. S. E. Cupp White Men Can't Jump or Judge Well (2009) May 31, 2009
No, Bamster is not from Nantucket.
So, we reached into our pocket, and located the thing for Obama The King with suggestions on how to suck it.
When I disapprove of something,
it's the only thing I can think of to do. It's a rather rude gesture, but at least it's clear what you mean. Katharine Hepburn in Katharine Hepburn: A Remarkable Woman by Anne Edwards (2000) May 30, 2009
We don't know if Bum will succeed
with whatever he started to breed, but we hope that storms, locusts, beetles and worms will take care of all of his seed...
An imposition of bad seed
is a robbery of the worst kind. George Washington in The writings of George Washington, Vol.28 (1944) May 29, 2009
State of Texas does not like Baracks.
Our rights, our guns, our trucks aren't here for them, and we wholly condemn their notion of freedom — it sucks.
Texas has yet to learn submission
to any oppression, come from what source it may. Sam Houston (1850) in Life of Sam Houston, of Texas by William Carey Crane (1884)
We are nerved for the contest, and must conquer or perish.
It is vain to look for present aid: none is at hand. We must now act or abandon all hope! Rally to the standard, and be no longer the scoff of mercenary tongues! Be men, be free men, that your children may bless their fathers' names. Sam Houston (1836) in History of Texas by J. M. Morphis (1875) May 28, 2009
When we went to our capital's “woods”,
those we met weren't Robins, but hoods. Not an obvious link, but Barack made us think: “Get this f#@$er away from the goods...”
Ahchoo: We didn't land on Sherwood Forest!
Sherwood Forest landed on us! Robin Hood: Men in Tights (1993)
As there is no worse lie than a truth misunderstood
by those who hear it, so reasonable arguments, challenges to magnanimity, and appeals to sympathy or justice, are folly when we are dealing with human crocodiles and boa-constrictors. William James The Varieties of Religious Experience (1902) May 27, 2009
Hey, Obama! Your communist stance
won't last very long — not a chance. Our country has seen through your commie machine long before you've started your dance.
How do you tell a communist?
Well, it's someone who reads Marx and Lenin. And how do you tell an anti-Communist? It's someone who understands Marx and Lenin. Ronald Reagan
He had the uneasy manner of a man
who is not among his own kind, and who has not seen enough of the world to feel that all people are in some sense his own kind. Willa Cather The Song of the Lark (1915) May 26, 2009
Friends, we are on the verge of collapse.
Can we heal ourselves? Yes, perhaps. There is only one way to prevent the decay: in two thousand ten — no relapse.
Words do not change their meaning
over the centuries as much as names do for us in the space of a few years. Marcel Proust The Guermantes Way (1920) Memorial Day · May 25, 2009
Lost your job? Getting ready to flee?
Everybody should move to D.C.! Perpetrating the gloom, Bamster started a boom: work for government — you'll be free!
The gentle government that promises
to hold our hand as we cross the street, once on the other side, refuses to let go. Theodore Forstmann As Capitalism Wins, the U.S. Drops Out (1995) May 24, 2009
No, Obama is not from Nantucket,
but he flew to the top like a rocket fueled by all kinds of crap he has managed to tap. When he lands — let him manage to duck it...
The dregs may stir themselves as they please;
they fall back to the bottom by their own coarseness. Joseph Joubert Some of the “Thoughts” of Joseph Joubert (1867) May 23, 2009
All investors! This doesn't make sense:
now your dollar is worth a few cents. How come you are mum on account of scum which is holding your life in suspense?
Familiarize yourself with the chains of bondage
and you prepare your own limbs to wear them. Abraham Lincoln Speech at Edwardsville (September 11, 1858) May 22, 2009
Listen, Bamster: it is very true,
we do wish a misfortune for you. It's a zero-sum game: if you win what you claim, we'll fight for the soup — in a queue.
It's just as unpleasant to get more
than you bargain for as to get less. George Bernard Shaw Getting Married (1908) May 21, 2009
No, Bamster is not from Nantucket,
He engaged in a different racket: he is peddling BS on TV in U.S. and it drips off the screen by the bucket. May 20, 2009
There is now a group called ACORN.
Bunch of scumbags, ill-bred and ill-born. Bamster helps them to thrive — he's the Queen of the hive, their soul... Saul Alinsky... reborn...
Worker bees can leave.
Even drones can fly away. The Queen is their slave. Chuck Palahniuk Fight Club (1996) May 19, 2009
We would like to expand the debate
on Obamian view of the State, where paying the way for O-Bummer to play, UAW got the rebate...
You pays your money and
you takes your chances. Anonymous 
May 18, 2009
There once was a boy, Little Barry
(that's “Barack” — so, “Hussein” must be “Harry”...) Back in time, when his mother got f#@$ed up by his father, Dear God, why she didn't miscarry?
O Arjun, the marks of those
who are born with demonic qualities are: Hypocrisy, arrogance, pride, anger, harshness, and ignorance. Bhagavat Gita
Prince John: Such an unusual name, “Latrine”.
How did your family come by it? Latrine: We changed it in the 9th century. Prince John: You mean you changed it TO “Latrine”? Latrine: Yeah. Used to be “S#@thouse”. Prince John: It's a good change. That's a good change! Robin Hood: Men in Tights (1993) May 17, 2009
There once was a man named Barack.
His nicknames made a sizable stack: Bamster, Bamson, Bumass, Bum Bin Bam, Bumitasse, Bamioso, O-Bum, Bam-Fumb-Duck...
You have but to know an object by its proper name
for it to lose its dangerous magic. Elias Canetti Auto-da-fé (1935)
Of all eloquence a nickname is the most concise,
and of all arguments the most unanswerable. William Hazlitt On Nicknames (1818) May 16, 2009
There once was a guy named Obama,
full of vinegar, p#ss , and some glamour. Glamour seems to be gone, and his eau de Cologne cannot cover the smell of the trauma...
There is no odor so bad
as that which arises from goodness tainted. Henry David Thoreau Walden; or, Life in the Woods (1854)
The only questions this year are
how badly will they stink, how long will they stink, and will they ever not stink? Senseless (1998) May 15, 2009
Politicians can turn on a dime.
That's the truth: they are slicker than slime. We are stuck in this mess, and we have to confess: we should know much better next time...
Every revolution evaporates and leaves behind
only the slime of a new bureaucracy. Franz Kafka in Conversations with Kafka by Gustav Janouch (1971) May 14, 2009
It's the time when we all have to learn,
that we can't spend more than we earn. Bamster — thanks for the “news”! We should thoughtfully choose next Messiah, wherever he's born...
Look at me. You're trying to tell me
you f#@$ed up without sounding stupid, and that's hard to do. Get Shorty (1995)
In this country everyone must
pay for everything he gets. L. Frank Baum The Wonderful Wizard of Oz (1900) May 13, 2009
Can you rhyme an “Obama” with “bummer”?
We have heard rhymes both smarter and dumber. Crystal balls are abound, and the one we have found, says: this rhyme will still fit in the summer...
Perfer et obdura; dolor hic tibi proderit olim.
[Latin, “Have patience and endure; this unhappiness will one day be beneficial.”] Ovid Amorum III (c.20 B.C.) May 12, 2009
Our president wants to embrace
new approach at prestissimo pace. Whose arrangements he sings? His appearance brings back again the Manchurian Case...
To know that one has a secret
is to know half the secret itself. Henry Ward Beecher Norwood: or, Village life in New England (1892) May 11, 2009
No, we do not believe in civility —
not when we are exposed to hostility. Bamster knows no restraint, so we certainly ain't contemplating the gentle docility. All the decency, all the nobility will not stop him. In all probability, parliamentary rules aren't suitable tools to protect our freedom's fragility. May 10, 2009
This is Sunday, all quiet and clear.
No news, so the day does appear as “before we were hit”... We just have to repeat: this O-Bum is a pain in the rear...
A certain conqueror asked Nasruddin:
“All the great rulers of the past had honorific titles with the name of God in them: there was, for instance, God-Gifted, God-Bestowed, God-Blest, and so on. How about suggesting some such name for me?” “God Forbid.”, said Nasruddin. The Funniest Tales of Mullah Nasruddin (2004)
The true paradise is
the paradise that we have lost. Marcel Proust Time Regained: In Search of Lost Time (1927) May 9, 2009
Bamster's fans are beginning to balk:
he was planning a vigorous walk all the way to kolkhoz and they weren't, because they kept thinking it was just the talk...
By the skillful and sustained use of propaganda,
one can make a people see even heaven as hell or an extremely wretched life as paradise. Adolf Hitler quoted in Ordeal by Battle by Cyril Falls (1943)
History is a vast early warning system.
Norman Cousins (1978) May 8, 2009
“Empathizing on someone's behind”
sounds close to things of the kind that our Bamster has done to so many, and none have reported sensations refined...
I think it's easy to mistake understanding
for empathy — we want empathy so badly... It's hard and ugly to know somebody can understand you without even liking you. Thomas Harris Hannibal (1999) 
May 7, 2009
“Can we grab some more companies, honey?”
“Yes — but clock has been rapidly running...” “Can we get just one more, like we did it before? Just ask Fed — they will print us more money!”
If all else fails, immortality can always
be assured by spectacular error. John Kenneth Galbraith Money: Whence It Came, Where It Went (1975) 
National Day of Prayer · May 6, 2009
Our Bamster does not want a day
when we all are encouraged to pray. He cannot make us pray to himself, so the way we would pray is, for him, so passé...
Unless we place our religion
and our treasure in the same thing, religion will always be sacrificed. Epictetus
He was of the faith chiefly in the sense
that the church he currently did not attend was Catholic. Kingsley Amis One Fat Englishman (1963) 
May 5, 2009
Our leader keeps all that he took.
Heaven knows what else he'll cook up with methods and plot from these pages he got memorized from the Lenin's cookbook...
Reporter: Do you have anything to say to your fans?
Mickey: You ain't seen nothin' yet. Natural Born Killers (1994)
The problem isn't the cook.
The problem is the cookbook. P. J. O'Rourke The Problem is Politics (2008) 
May 4, 2009
We're flying American flags.
Flags are flying. Prosperity lags. Rags to riches we went, but the way this is bent, we'll go from riches to rags...
Hope is the feeling you have
that the feeling you have isn't permanent. Jean Kerr Finishing Touches (1973)
The prevalent fear of poverty
among the educated classes is the worst moral disease from which our civilization suffers. William James The Varieties of Religious Experience (1902) 
May 3, 2009
He assumes that his ego (in charge
of his goals and his habits) will barge into everyone's life, slicing through, like a knife... Listen, Bamster: your cage is too large.
...A swollen magpie in a fitful sun,
Half black half white Not knowst'ou wing from tail Pull down thy vanity How mean thy hates Fostered in falsity Pull down thy vanity Rathe to destroy, niggard in charity Pull down thy vanity I say pull down. Ezra Pound Canto LXXXI (1945) 
May 2, 2009
Our leader is bleeding us dry.
So, a “bleeder”? Confused?... To comply with the special need to define such a bleed, “Bleader” would be a good one to try.
There is no worse tyranny than to force a man
to pay for what he does not want merely because you think it would be good for him. Robert A. Heinlein The Moon is a Harsh Mistress (1966)
And tell how little our large veins would bleed,
Would we but yield them to thy bitter need. William Cullen Bryant To a Mosquito (1836) 
May 1, 2009
Our country is tired and blue,
coughing, sneezing, and fever just grew, aggravating headaches, sudden chills, body aches... Swine or not, this one feels like a flu.
The ideal way to get rid of
any infectious disease would be to shoot instantly every person who comes down with it. H. L. Mencken The Library The American Mercury (1925)
In a nation ruled by swine,
all pigs are upwardly mobile — and the rest of us are f#@$ed until we can put our acts together. Hunter S. Thompson The Great Shark Hunt (1979) April 30, 2009
Bum got Chrysler and General Motors.
(UAW were the promoters...). It is safe to assume that two bankruptcies loom... Get your hatchets, bondholders — and voters!
We have a lot of people revolutionizing the world
because they've never had to present a working model. Charles F. Kettering in Prophet of Progress by Thomas Alvin Boyd (1961)
One of the things the government can't do is run anything.
The only things our government runs are the post office and the railroads, and both of them are bankrupt. Lee Iacocca (2003) April 29, 2009
100 days isn't really much.
But Obama has shown his touch. Tried to grab a whole lot, but so far, all he got was debris from his “touching” and such... April 28, 2009
There once was one Senator Specter,
widows, orphans, and wildlife protector. When we heard all the news, we were somewhat confused: gnaw your own? That's Hannibal Lecter!
There isn't any finer folks living
than a Republican that votes the Democratic ticket. Will Rogers How We Elect Our Presidents (1952) April 27, 2009
Our chances for peace? None or slim.
With Obama, we are on a limb. Why we weren't (or were?) hit again — “blast and blur”? Maybe, next 9/11 was — HIM?
What is the use of straining after an amiable view of things,
when a cynical view is most likely to be the true one? George Bernard Shaw The Irrational Knot (1905)
All warfare is based on deception.
Hence, when able to attack, we must seem unable; when using our forces, we must seem inactive; when we are near, we must make the enemy believe we are far away; when far away, we must make him believe we are near. Sun Tzu The Art of War (c.6th century B.C.) April 26, 2009
“All is here, and nothing amiss.”
“We are leaping across this abyss...” In the midst of the bliss, why we hear a hiss? (We should not think — on Sunday! — like this...)
...He hears
On all sides, from innumerable tongues A dismal universal hiss, the sound Of public scorn. John Milton Paradise Lost (1667) April 25, 2009
Hey, America! How you feel?
Tired? Nauseous? Refusing a meal? All those symptoms do tell that you may not be well... “Morning after”? You may need a pill.
It is no time for mirth and laughter,
the cold, gray dawn of the morning after! George Ade Verses and Jingles (1911) April 24, 2009
Tell Obama to go pound sand.
He “barack”ed all of our land. He is selling your kids, your grand-kids, great-grand-kids as his slaves — to his communist band.
The benevolent despot who sees himself
as a shepherd of the people still demands from others the submissiveness of sheep. Eric Hoffer The Ordeal of Change (1963) April 23, 2009
What a pompous, self-centered dolt!
Every step — a misstep and a jolt. The Obamian mass has exalted this ass having no better ass to exalt.
Fashion consultant: If you ever need an outfit
to match that stick up your a#@, give me a call. Hung (2009)
An ass is beautiful in the eyes of an ass.
Latin proverb in Latin Proverbs and Quotations by Alfred Henderson (1869) April 22, 2009
“Wishing all of the Reds to be dead,
they are livid, determined, and led by desire to beat all this communist s#@t.” Yep. That's us (maybe, not enough said…).
Never fight fair with a stranger, boy.
You'll never get out of the jungle that way. Arthur Miller Death of a Salesman (1949) April 21, 2009
Having guns (not yet taken by bans),
send them South, with definite plans: this will help us to find what's the prevalent kind, Mexi-CANNOTs, or... well... Mexi-CANs?
Are you a Mexi-CAN or a Mexi-CAN'T?
Once Upon a Time in Mexico (2003)
There are four kinds of homicide:
felonious, excusable, justifiable, and praiseworthy. Ambrose Bierce The Devil's Dictionary (1911) April 20, 2009
The “official photo” of you,
Bamster, doesn't diminish the view that a fascist content is a part of intent that is driving both you and your crew. No changes in shape — just the light, the moustache (you could grow it, right?). Change the brightness, contrast — and the ghost from the past will be keeping us frightened all night...
If you want a vision of the future,
imagine a boot stamping on a human face — forever. George Orwell Nineteen Eighty-Four (1949)
Here is something we discovered:
1. Download the official portrait of Bamster at http://change.gov/page/-/officialportrait.jpg 2. Save the image and open it in Photoshop. 3. DO NOT CHANGE ANY PART OF THE PORTRAIT. 4. Convert the image to Grayscale (Image-Mode-Grayscale). 5. Using Image-Adjustments-Brightness/Contrast, adjust Brightness to (-36), and Contrast to (+96). 6. Add the moustache... To see the animated changes, click here (animated GIF file: 1.29 Mb — it does take a few seconds to download). April 19, 2009
Our leader is sweating with fear
as the end of his term draws near. Not so near, you'd say. Still few years, you'd say. But by then — no bull, just a steer...
You fellows know what a steer is.
That's a bull who's lost his social standing. Lyndon B. Johnson in The Johnson Humor by Bill Adler (1964)
At the least, bear patiently,
if thou canst not joyfully. Thomas à Kempis The Imitation of Christ (1418) April 18, 2009
Waterboarding and other pursuits —
oh, the joy of all ACLUts! Can't torture? This scum? Why? This should've become most preferred of the questioning routes! Waterboarding is nothing. They kill our people — by this, they shall seal their fate. They were warned, and will get what they earned. We should rip them a new one. We will.
We are all ready to be savage in some cause.
The difference between a good man and a bad one is the choice of the cause. William James The letters of William James (1920)
The ancient Romans might as well have said,
“Oh the Germanic tribes have valid nationalistic and cultural aspirations. Let's pull the legions off the Rhine, submit our differences to a multilateral peace conference chaired by the Pathan Empire and start a Vandal studies program at the Academy in Athens.” P. J. O'Rourke Holidays in Hell (2000) April 17, 2009
We predicted: Fidel and Barack
are two cars on the very same track. Do you wonder which one will come first — with Iran catching up while they don't look back?
The enemy is anybody who's going to get you killed,
no matter which side he's on. Joseph Heller Catch-22 (1961) April 16, 2009
This Obama thing doesn't look right.
He's the only one claiming the light, while the darkness falls down on our cities and towns, telling us we belong in the night. Hey, Obama! Don't bet on your might. Things are changing — they will be made right. We are still in the dark, but remember: one spark makes the fire — which lights up the night.
As nightfall does not come all at once,
neither does oppression. In both instances, there is a twilight when everything remains seemingly unchanged. And it is in such twilight that we all must be most aware of change in the air — however slight — lest we become unwitting victims of the darkness. William O. Douglas The Douglas Letters (1987)
Mine eyes have seen the glory of the coming of the Lord:
He is trampling out the vintage where the grapes of wrath are stored; He hath loosed the fateful lightning of his terrible swift sword: His truth is marching on. Julia Ward Howe Battle Hymn of the Republic (1862) National Tea Party · April 15, 2009
Boston Harbor has seen a discord
over taxes we couldn't afford. Now, the question remains: under current constraints, what or whom do we throw overboard?
The most important ways in which I think the Internet
will affect the big issue is that it will make it more difficult for government to collect taxes. Milton Friedman PBS interview (2000) April 14, 2009
Roman legions oft settled the score
when returning back home from the war, kicking emperor's butt. Is this what we've got in the “right-wing” assumptions galore?
It is not with much credulity
I listen to any when they speak evil of those whom they are going to plunder. Edmund Burke Reflections on the Revolution in France (1790) April 13, 2009
Any tax aggravates hypertension.
You have lost all your savings — and pension. So, O-Bum took his share. Should the rest be right there? We don't think so. Just file an extension...
The power to tax, once conceded, has no limits;
it continues until it destroys. Robert A. Heinlein The Moon is a Harsh Mistress (1966)
I would like to electrocute everyone who uses
the word “fair” in connection with income tax policies. William F. Buckley, Jr. Better Than Nothing (1985) April 12, 2009
Three confirmed individual kills.
Thieves were killed, and it matters — it feels good. All thieves will be dead once we're dealing in lead, letting Hillary manage all squeals. Three confirmed individual kills. Thank you, Navy, for letting your Seals do their job on the dot. They are heroes we got just before we got all these new deals...
It's the fact that Republicans are squares.
And it's the squares who know how to fly the fighter planes and operate the missiles and the bombs and work the M-16s. Liberals would still be fumbling with the federally mandated trigger locks. P. J. O'Rourke Godzilla Lives Here (2002)
Here let those reign, whom Pensions can incite,
To vote a Patriot black, a Courtier white, Explain their Country's dear-bought Rights away And plead for Pirates in the Face of Day. Samuel Johnson London: A Poem (1738) 
April 11, 2009
Teachers? No, just gullible fools.
Think Obama is one of the tools to promote better learning? While our country is burning? Get his portraits away from your schools!
Human history becomes more and more
a race between education and catastrophe. H. G. Wells The Outline of History (1919)
Ars fit, ubi a teneris crimen condiscitur annis.
[Latin, “Where crime is taught from early years, it becomes a part of nature.”] Ovid Heroides (c.25 B.C.) April 10, 2009
ASU, Arizona — God bless!
You could do nothing more, nothing less: You would lose either way — be it Yay, be it Nay — but your Nay is the Mark Of Finesse. “Lack of lifetime achievement”. These words will be lost in the books for the nerds, but your stand will remain as the proof of disdain for O-Bummer. The rest? For the birds.
We didn't think it was appropriate to make Tyson
an honorary citizen so we dropped the plan. Many people said (the honorary citizenship) would be inappropriate. For one thing it will be the first time Tyson has even visited our town. He has also been involved in too many legal and sporting scandals. Wang Qiquan
Boswell: Boswell. Nigel Boswell. 006. You know what that means?
Clouseau: Of course! It means you are one short of the big-time. Pink Panther (2006) April 9, 2009
There once was a guy named Barack.
He'll now repair your truck, mow your lawn, cook your food. If you are in the mood, he may do other things... Best of luck!
Real evil is coercive. And an individual does not have
the power to coerce that a government has — even if dope and machine guns are legalized. P. J. O'Rourke The War of the We Against the Me (2002)
In the general course of human nature,
a power over a man's subsistence amounts to a power over his will. Alexander Hamilton The Federalist Papers (1787 – 1788), No.79 
April 8, 2009
We are led by a socialist fitch,
and he says that we all have to pitch in destroying our land, and submit to his band... What an arrogant son-of-a-b#@ch!
All that the Devil asks is acquiescence...
Not struggle, not conflict. Acquiescence. Suzanne Massie Journey (1975)
Londo: Ah, arrogance and stupidity
all in the same package. How efficient of you. Babylon 5: In the Beginning (1998) April 7, 2009
In Caracas, Havana, Beijing
tyrants rule, and there isn't a thing we'll do to them now just because we somehow ended up with Obama The King...
Dictatorship nations are outlaws. Any free nation had
the right to invade Nazi Germany and, today, has the right to invade Soviet Russia, Cuba, or any other slave pen. Whether a free nation chooses to do so or not is a matter of its own self-interest, not of respect for the nonexistent “rights” of gang rulers. It is not a free nation's duty to liberate other nations at the price of self-sacrifice, but a free nation has the right to do it, when and if it so chooses. Ayn Rand Collectivized “Rights” (1963)
Calvin: Life's disappointments are harder to take
when you don't know any swear words. The Indispensable Calvin And Hobbes (1992) April 6, 2009
Aspirations get higher and higher:
Bamster thinks that he is a Messiah. So, his plans grow fast (God forbid, he'll last...): first, U.S.; then the world is on fire.
Stupidity combined with arrogance
and a huge ego will get you a long way. Chris Lowe The Observer (2003)
I have never killed any one,
but I have read some obituary notices with great satisfaction. Clarence Darrow The Story of My Life (1932) April 5, 2009
Hey, Barack! We must now confess:
you are not any good for U.S. Go work for E.U. or U.N. There, you will be matched to your job, more or less... You've been dreaming of this, haven't you? Ruling all of the world — on a cue from your communist clique... Just keep watching this flick as you move to U.N. — or E.U....
The urge to save humanity is almost always
only a false-face for the urge to rule it. H. L. Mencken Minority Report (1956)
After the events of the 20th century,
God, quite reasonably, left Europe. But He's still here in the United States. P. J. O'Rourke Letter to Our European Friends (2008) April 4, 2009
Hey, Obama! Your visit to France
is a part of a well-known dance: it has shown so far where your loyalties are... not with us — not today, not a chance... Your regards for the heroes of war aren't worthy of nothing no more. Tell your friends in Berlin who may find it quite mean: those who do, aren't friends, but a foe. There's a graveyard in Normandy, which doesn't need your retarded sales pitch. They will never collect, but you should pay respect to those heroes, you son-of-a-b#@ch!
Take up our quarrel with the foe:
To you from failing hands we throw The torch; be yours to hold it high. If ye break faith with us who die We shall not sleep, though poppies grow In Flanders fields. John McCrae In Flanders Fields (1915)
Anyone who clings to the historically untrue — and thoroughly immoral — doctrine
that “violence never solves anything” I would advise to conjure up the ghosts of Napoleon Bonaparte and of the Duke of Wellington and let them debate it. The ghost of Hitler could referee, and the jury might well be the Dodo, the Great Auk, and the Passenger Pigeon. Violence, naked force, has settled more issues in history than has any other factor, and the contrary opinion is wishful thinking at its worst. Breeds that forget this basic truth have always paid for it with their lives and freedoms. Robert A. Heinlein Starship Troopers (1959) 
April 3, 2009
Now, O-Bum kissed a Saudi hand.
To interpret this gesture, we stand to remind you: we saw this occurrence before, in the movie... Please, let us expand: Bamster bowed to Saudi king, kissed his hand. Now, why do you think such a gesture was due if it's not to pursue the submission, the “family” thing? Our leader kissed Saudi king. On the lips? No, the hand (or the ring…) He'd go for the peach, but he couldn't have reached through the robe to get hold of the thing... 
April 2, 2009
An iPod for Her Majesty... Why???
“Made in China” (it was — don't deny)... Did you do it because she's not likely, of course, to obtain one herself at Best Buy?
Such labored nothings, in so strange a style,
Amaze th' unlearned, and make the learned smile. Alexander Pope An Essay on Criticism (1709)
It must have taken him a great deal of pains
to become what we now see him. Such an excess of stupidity, Sir, is not in Nature. Samuel Johnson in The Life of Samuel Johnson by James Boswell (1791) 
April 1, 2009
We are joking, and Lucifer hears,
and he mills grains of truth into fears. With Obamian “bliss”, we're worried that this stupid joke may well last for four years...
The best way to drive out the devil,
if he will not go for texts of Scripture, is to jeer and flout him, for he cannot bear scorn. Martin Luther in The Table Talk of Martin Luther (1872)
Verbal: The greatest trick the Devil ever pulled
was convincing the world he didn't exist. The Usual Suspects (1995) 
March 31, 2009
Old King Midas had nothing to eat.
He was cursed with a gift, hard to beat: he turned things into gold... But Barack beat him cold: he could turn any gold into s#@t.
Midas, they say, possessed the art of old
Of turning whatsoe'er he touch'd to gold; This modern statesmen can reverse with ease — Touch them with gold, they'll turn to what you please. John Wolcot Epigram in The Cambridge Book of Lesser Poets by J. C. Squire (1927)
Midas: Alas! Do not torture me so fiercely,
that's simply how it sounded to me! Phoebus: See then, you shall have ass's ears! J. S. Bach Cantata #21 Geschwinde, ihr wirbelnden Winde (1729) March 30, 2009
Poor Rick Wagoner! Hasn't he bent
all the way from the fall to the Lent? And he wasn't much worse than the a#@ (of a horse), which had brought his career to an end...
The arrogance of officialdom
should be tempered and controlled, and assistance to foreign hands should be curtailed, lest Rome fall. Cicero March 29, 2009
Hey, Obama! Take all of your deals.
Shove them, hard (so you know how it feels) up the obvious port, so we know it hurt just as much as your stimulus bills.
The sower of the seed is surely author
of the whole harvest of mischief. Demosthenes Orations (1900)
Calvin: In my opinion, we don't devote nearly
enough scientific research to finding a cure for jerks. Calvin and Hobbes (1990) March 28, 2009
We would love to relieve this great nation
of Obama and Obamination. We would have him impeached as a communist leech sucking money from all of creation.
You can always trust the Americans.
In the end they will do the right thing, after they have eliminated all the other possibilities. Winston Churchill March 27, 2009
Now, children, your papa and mama
may have lost their jobs. It's a bummer. God can help you. So, please, start your prayers like this: “Dear God! Please take Mr. Obama!”
The production of too many useful things
results in too many useless people. Karl Marx Economic and Philosophical Manuscripts (1844)
God seems to have left the receiver off the hook,
and time is running out. Arthur Koestler The Ghost in the Machine (1967) March 26, 2009
Special Service called him “Renegade”.
How prophetic this was? His brigade is dismantling U.S. by creating a mess that the Founding Fathers forbade.
A nation can survive its fools, and even the ambitious.
But it cannot survive treason from within... ...For the traitor appears not a traitor; he speaks in accents familiar to his victims, and he wears their face and their arguments, he appeals to the baseness that lies deep in the hearts of all men. He rots the soul of a nation, he works secretly and unknown in the night to undermine the pillars of the city, he infects the body politic so that it can no longer resist. A murderer is less to fear. The traitor is the plague. Cicero (42 B.C.)
We are threatened with many evils, and treason not least;
but one thing is not said: that we shall suffer from cowardice, from cravens or the fear of cravens. J. R. R. Tolkien The Lord Of The Rings (1949) March 25, 2009
There once was a King named Barack.
No crown, no subjects to whack, no throne, no Queen... just a stupid machine with a screen full of words, back-to-back...
If we complain about the tune,
there is no reason to attack the monkey when the organ grinder is present. Aneurin Bevan (1957)
If you talk to God, you are praying.
If God talks to you, you have schizophrenia. Thomas Szasz The Second Sin (1973) March 24, 2009
Sixty-some unbelievable days,
and Obama is making his ways, organizing the hood just the way that it stood in Chicago where crime always pays... March 23, 2009
We should stop all this vigorous lootin',
but it may cause a major uprootin'... We shall risk our behind. We've made up our mind: take Obama. We want our Putin...
Ivanoff: In Moscow we fought
for an inch of freedom! Here you take it and pour s#@t all over it. Moscow on the Hudson (1984)
When did the future switch
from being a promise to being a threat? Chuck Palahniuk Invisible Monsters (1999) March 22, 2009
Friends and countrymen! Lend us your ear,
but make sure you cover your rear! Our leader, as is, is the end of it... Please, get this idiot outta here...
We're not here to do good.
We're here to do anything we damn well please — and take the consequences. P. J. O'Rourke The War of the We Against the Me (2002) March 21, 2009
Anesthetics and news make us numb.
But sometimes, observations of scum make us see hidden links to invisible things — could Barack be the missing imam???
One by one and man to man, Arabs are the salt of the earth —
generous, hospitable, brave, wise, and so forth. But get you in a pack and shove a Koran down your pants and you act like a footlocker full of glue sniffing civet cats. P. J. O'Rourke Holidays in Hell (2000)
It is the strange fate of man,
that even in the greatest of evils the fear of the worst continues to haunt him. Johann Wolfgang von Goethe March 20, 2009
King Obama got his education
in the top law school of the nation. Men who paid for his school must have chosen this fool for his special road to damnation.
Harvard is the home of American ideas;
there have been several of these, and somebody has to take the blame for them. P. J. O'Rourke Holidays in Hell (2000)
The safest road to Hell is the gradual one —
the gentle slope, soft underfoot, without sudden turnings, without milestones, without signposts. C. S. Lewis The Screwtape Letters (1942) March 19, 2009
Everybody agrees: we are f#@$ed,
or as we could have said, are “barack”ed. Barney Frank disagweed, designating the gweed as the weason we awen't intact.
The most serious dangers for American freedom
and the American way of life do not come from without. Ludwig von Mises Economic Freedom and Interventionism (1980) March 18, 2009
Screw the socialistic approach!
Let's impeach this community coach! There must be a way to return to the day just before we've gotten this roach.
We starve the rats, creosote the ticks,
swat the flies, step on the cockroaches and poison the scales. Yet when these pests appear in human form we go paralytic. Martin H. Fischer Fischerisms (1944)
There is no safety for honest men, but by believing
all possible evil of evil men, and by acting with promptitude, decision, and steadiness on that belief. Edmund Burke Burke's Works (1864) March 17, 2009
Castro, Chávez, Obama and Putin
have been planning to do their lootin' of the countries they led, just as all of them said while campaigning, with words highfalutin'...
If you have been voting for politicians who promise
to give you goodies at someone else's expense, then you have no right to complain when they take your money and give it to someone else, including themselves. Thomas Sowell (1992)
The best laid schemes o' Mice an' Men,
Gang aft agley, An' lea'e us nought but grief an' pain, For promis'd joy! Robert Burns To A Mouse (1785) March 16, 2009
There is now a guy named Barack.
He is busy around the clock seeking ways he could take all the money you make, and distribute it all to his flock.
Robin Hood: We never rob. We just sort of borrow
a bit from those who can afford it. Little John: Borrow? Boy, are we in debt. Robin Hood (1973)
The poor spendthrift vagabond says to a rich man:
“I have discovered there is enough money in the world for all of us, if it was equally divided; this must be done, and we shall all be happy together.” “But,” was the response, “if everybody was like you, it would be spent in two months, and what would you do then?” “Oh! divide again; keep dividing, of course!” P. T. Barnum Art of Money Getting (1880) March 15, 2009
You have heard of the stimulus bill.
It will surely fail — yes, it will. All this money will go to repay for the flow of the money to buy “people's will”...
Your welfare is my concern.
Do a favour for me, I'll do one in return. If you'll scratch my back then I'll scratch your back. Elvis Presley Scratch My Back (1966) March 14, 2009
We are headed straight down to Hell.
Our leader is not doing well. In this whole money biz, he behaves like he is just a patsy — but he can't tell...
He who would do good to another
must do it in Minute Particulars: general Good is the plea of the scoundrel, hypocrite, and flatterer. William Blake Jerusalem The Emanation of The Giant Albion (c.1821)
What is your substance, whereof are you made,
That millions of strange shadows on you tend? William Shakespeare Sonnet LIII (1609) March 13, 2009
Illinois, known well for corruption,
has produced a corruptoeruption: one of theirs went up all the way to the top, where now he has every option... March 12, 2009
All politicos look for a buyer.
One of them went (just recently) higher than he (ever) could climb. What his buyers bought? Time just until someone screams: “What a liar!”
Foolish men imagine that because judgment
for an evil thing is delayed, there is no justice; but only accident here below. Thomas Carlyle in Pearls of Thought by Maturin M. Ballou (1882) March 11, 2009
Here we have New American Pie,
smashed to pieces, inedible, dry... All this crap has been served, and O-Bum had the nerve to suggest that you give it a try...
For one to expect or ask things of others
that he himself, if asked, would not be willing to do or give, is the worst kind of arrogance. Anthony Beal
When small men attempt great enterprises,
they always end by reducing them to the level of their mediocrity. Napoleon Bonaparte March 10, 2009
There once was a hag named Pelosi.
All her staff played the ring-around-the-“rosy”: while her broom was repaired, all the planes were prepared, so her flights would be easy and cosy.
But as long as the nation is obsessed
with historic milestones, is no one going to remark on what a great country it is where a mentally retarded woman can become Speaker of the House? Ann Coulter (2009)
Lisa: Poor little Maggie...
How many mental competency hearings have you been to, in your short life? The Simpsons (1989) March 9, 2009
Bamster's speeches are always left-bound,
but his handlers are yet to be found... Who is pulling his strings? All invisible kings of the dollar, the euro, the pound...
Blofeld: A terrible catastrophe now confronts you.
However, it can be avoided by paying a tribute to our organization. Never Say Never Again (1983) March 8, 2009
Activism, alarmism, and Marxism
are beyond our harsh criticism. Don't throw any rocks — get this ass off his box. We're not ready for socialism.
Max: This country's still growing up.
Certain diseases, you're better off having when you're still young. Once upon a time in America (1984)
Half the world suffering is caused by
earnest messages contained in grand theories bearing no relation to reality — Marxism and No-Fault Auto Insurance, to name two. P. J. O'Rourke Holidays in Hell (2000) March 7, 2009
Mr. Brown, please do not respond
to the jerk on our side of the pond. Opportunities bloom to replace him, of whom we ourselves are not really fond...
It is a mistake that there is no bath
that will cure people's manners. But drowning would help. Mark Twain Marienbad, a Health Factory (1891) March 6, 2009
Bamster, learn: Mr. Brown has come
from Great Britain, you ignorant bum! DVDs may be good as a gift in your hood, but in his, they are really dumb!
Liberty cannot be preserved,
if the manners of the people are corrupted. Algernon Sidney Discourses Concerning Government (1751) March 5, 2009
Our president speaks of salvation
of all people from their desperation. He is ready to fight. In the process, he might dissipate our wonderful nation.
Talk of imminent threat to our national security
through the application of external force is pure nonsense. Our threat is from the insidious forces working from within. Douglas MacArthur March 4, 2009
Hey, Obama! Get ready for this:
we want none of your communist bliss. China's waiting for you: you'll give their milieu the diversity they may have missed.
I was reminded of the words of Chairman Mao:
it's always darkest before it's totally black. John McCain 
March 3, 2009
There must be some value in treason.
Otherwise, we do not see the reason why Barack would insist that U.S. should exist only when it resembles a prison.
Otter: Well, you can do whatever you want to us,
but we're not going to sit here and listen to you badmouth the United States of America. Animal House (1978)
Treason doth never prosper: what's the reason?
Why if it prosper, none dare call it treason. John Harington Epigrams (1605) March 2, 2009
Don't try to dissect every drivel.
Don't forget — we are dealing with evil, of the ultimate kind: “from within”, “from behind”... ...oops... we cannot be constantly civil... March 1, 2009
There once was a guy named Barack,
He had ears like flaps on a truck. He did not have them pinned, so they picked every wind while his a#@ had to pick all the slack...
...so confused he don't know whether to
scratch his watch or wind his butt... Steel Magnolias (1989)
Jeff: For Christ's sake, we're f#@kin'
with the President of the United States. Rudy: He f#@ks with us, doesn't he? Used Cars (1980) February 28, 2009
Our leader still thinks he is cool,
and his groupies continue to drool: “What a wonderful voice!” Do you hear the noise that will drown the voice — with the fool?
I think you're the opposite of a paranoid.
I think you go around with the insane delusion that people like you. Deconstructing Harry (1997) February 27, 2009
If Obama did all that he said,
spreading plague that he started to spread, we would live in a camp, run by Bamster The Champ, and would wish we were already dead...
...The world is in a bad way, my man,
and bound to be worse before it mends... ...Keep clear of the dupes that talk democracy and the dogs that talk revolution, drunk with talk, liars and believers. I believe in my tusks. Long live freedom and damn the ideologies... Robinson Jeffers The Stars Go Over The Lonely Ocean (1940)
A government big enough to give you everything you want,
is a government big enough to take from you everything you have. Gerald Ford (1974) February 26, 2009
We are sure: O-Bum won't need
our help in promoting his lead to convert every trade into social aid which will fail to support and to feed.
Destroy his fib, or sophistry, in vain!
The creature's at his dirty work again. Alexander Pope Prologue to the Satires (1735)
The welfare state is not really about the welfare
of the masses. It is about the egos of the elites. Thomas Sowell Human Livestock (2006) February 25, 2009
In America built by O-Bum,
every bird stays in line for the crumb, every cat gets its mice substituted by rice, and they live in a government slum.
...in the next quarter century
the most dramatic change in the Third World will be the United States becoming a part of it. P. J. O'Rourke Holidays in Hell (2000)
And having looked to Government for bread,
on the very first scarcity they will turn and bite the hand that fed them. Edmund Burke Thoughts and Details on Scarcity (1795) February 24, 2009
Here are Bamster's designs that we dread:
clothes — green, so Islam would be spread, money — dirtiest black, food — discolored snack, and the White House — blindingly Red.
A man's character always takes its hue, more or less,
from the form and color of things about him. Frederick Douglass Life and Times of Frederick Douglass (1882)
Every philosophy is tinged with the colouring
of some secret imaginative background, which never emerges explicitly into its trains of reasoning. Alfred North Whitehead Science and the Modern World (1925) February 23, 2009
Seven hundred Obamian million
for election, where seventy million have been properly bought... Just ten bucks for a vote! If we paid this, we'd save a gazillion...
All we have of freedom — all we use or know —
This our fathers bought for us, long and long ago. Rudyard Kipling The Old Issue (1899)
Pretio parata vincitur pretio fides.
[Latin, “Faith gained by bribes is overcome by bribes.”] Seneca Agamemnon February 22, 2009
From the start, this malicious affair
with Obama was too much to bear. Time to stop it — indeed, all we need is a Lead. Hey, Republicans! Grow a pair...
There is only one thing that gives me hope
as a Republican, and that is the Democrats. It's going to be hard to do a worse job running America than the Republicans have, but if anybody can do it, it's the Democrats. P. J. O'Rourke The Problem is Politics (2008)
God gives nuts to the toothless.
Spanish proverb ...and teeth to the nutless. OBAMAFU editorial comment February 21, 2009
Little Barry, how scared you are
that the truth will come out and mar fairy tales that you spun — they will all come undone! And we bet: you're thinking this far...
In politics, what begins in fear
usually ends in folly. Samuel Taylor Coleridge in Coleridge's Table Talk and Omniana (1917)
Marge: It's the Seven Horsemen of the Apocalypse.
Bart, are you wearing clean underwear? Bart: Not anymore. The Simpsons (1989) February 20, 2009
Bamster cannot be — ever! — at fault
(very common for this kind of dolt): when he fails, he forgets, he regrets, and he lets all his press bring his fall to a halt.
My only regret with Timothy McVeigh is he did not
go to the New York Times Building. Ann Coulter (2002)
A man can fail many times, but he isn't a failure
until he begins to blame somebody else. John Burroughs February 19, 2009
Bamster made us much cleaner — by making
all his crooks, who were patiently faking their love for U.S., to divulge and confess their yearning for stealing and breaking.
God employs several translators;
some pieces are translated by age, some by sickness, some by war, some by justice. John Donne Devotions (1624) February 18, 2009
Listen, Bamster! We want our cars!
Shove your plans, and your pals, and your czars, and your dogs, and your swine, where the sun does not shine — deep enough so you see all the stars...
I've upped my standard, now up yours.
Pat Paulsen (1968) February 17, 2009
Learn your civics. You have to protect
your Republic and Flag. The respect they command can be lost — then your future is toast. That's the cause. Bamster is the effect.
Every citizen of the republic ought
to consider himself an unofficial policeman, and keep unsalaried watch and ward over the laws and their execution. Mark Twain Traveling with a Reformer (1893) February 16, 2009
Teleprompter? For President's pitch?
Feeling this curiosity itch: led we never had been by a reading machine — how did we end up with this b#@ch?
Causa latet: vis est notissima.
[Latin, “The cause is hidden, but the result is known.”] Ovid Metamorphoses (8 A.D.)
Crime is a fact of the human species,
a fact of that species alone, but it is above all the secret aspect, impenetrable and hidden. Crime hides, and by far the most terrifying things are those which elude us. George Bataille The Trial of Gilles de Rais (1965) 
February 15, 2009
Every present and past commissar,
like Obama, was envying Czar. Envy! This is what rules meager minds of these fools 'cause their tools aren't up to the par...
For something in the envy of the small
Still loves the vast Democracy of Death! Edward Robert Bulwer-Lytton The Bones Of Raphael (1853) St. Valentine's Day · February 14, 2009
Very close to Capitol Hill,
our president is standing still, contemplating the time, when — and this is sublime! — Little Monica blew Uncle Bill... Why we think that this time was sublime? This is obvious: it was the time, when our president did this unfortunate kid, while our country was next one in line...
You live in a country that makes it harder
to raise children than any country in the world. You vote for me and I'll give you family values. Bill Clinton (1992)
America is not a clan or a pedigree.
America is a duly constituted association of free people. We're not married to each other. We're not even dating, as we should have learned from our former president who thought he was the whole country's boyfriend. P. J. O'Rourke Wartime and Family Time (2001) February 13, 2009
All Progressives, united for change!
Stop and think. It's the time to arrange your surrender in kind (and if we may remind, you may get back your brain, in exchange).
Many an honest man practises upon himself
an amount of deceit sufficient, if practised upon another, and in a little different way, to send him to the State's prison. Christian Nestell Bovee Intuitions and Summaries of Thought (1862) Lincoln's Birthday · February 12, 2009
“I do NOT wish to call on Creator
to confirm who was smaller or greater. Count those roaming free just because they have me! This is now — more roaming comes later!”
Perhaps no man is happy
without a delusion of some kind. Christian Nestell Bovee Intuitions and Summaries of Thought (1862) February 11, 2009
CBS, ABC, NBC
do not see what we see, and we see way too much of O-Bum. We would settle for some other men, both A.D. and B.C.
Self-laudation abounds among the unpolished;
but nothing can stamp a man more sharply as ill-bred. Charles Buxton Notes of Thought (1873) February 10, 2009
“Dear Lord, please make Bamster to give
me all things that I needed, to live like he told me I will — I believed it, until our neighbor has called me “naive” !”
Oh Lord, won't you buy me a Mercedes Benz?
My friends all drive Porsches, I must make amends. Worked hard all my lifetime, no help from my friends, So Lord, won't you buy me a Mercedes Benz? Janice Joplin Mercedes Benz (1970)
Only idiots and infants “need” things.
Adults “want” things. The language of needs is the native tongue of socialists, therapeutists, and paternalists of all sorts and is addressed to needy dependents. The language of wants is spoken by self-respecting adults and is addressed to other self-respecting adults. Thomas Szasz The Second Sin (1973) February 9, 2009
World, ideal for us (we're tired):
no news, whether printed or wired, no Dems, and of course, no worries, because BHO would already be fired.
Whatever we plant in our subconscious mind
and nourish with repetition and emotion will one day become a reality. Earl Nightingale February 8, 2009
There once was a king, King O-Bum.
In his youth, as the Lord of the Slum, he was learning his ways to the ultimate craze — to The Communist Heaven For Some.
Man, proud man,
Dressed in a little brief authority, Most ignorant of what he's most assured, His glassy essence, like an angry ape, Plays such fantastic tricks before high heaven As make the angels weep... William Shakespeare Measure for Measure (1604)
When rationalism destroyed heaven
and decided to set it up here on earth, that most terrible of all goals entered human ambition. It was clear there'd be no end to what people would be made to suffer for it. Nadine Gordimer Burger's Daughter (1979) February 7, 2009
Here: Obamian, Obamythology,
Obamistical, Obamapology. How many new terms we've coined! This confirms the necessity for Obamology.
There is no use indicting words,
they are no shoddier than what they peddle. Samuel Beckett Malone Dies (1958)
Such things may be imagined,
but words have no power to impress the mind without the exquisite horror of their reality. Edgar Allan Poe The Narrative of A. Gordon Pym of Nantucket (1838) February 6, 2009
We do not take vacations or trips,
staying busy deciphering tips that we get from Barack. We are losing the track of his Obamaistical scripts.
We're going to sell you a room
full of horse s#@t. And with that much horse s#@t, you just know there's a pony in there somewhere. P. J. O'Rourke We Blew It (2008)
Lisa: Cheer up, Dad. Did you know the Chinese
use the same word for “crisis” as they do for “opportunity”? Homer: Yes. Crisitunity. The Simpsons (1989) February 5, 2009
There once was a man named Barack,
full of pride for his colorful flock, but by now, we know whom he carried in tow, and we know: his minions suck.
The shepherd always tries to persuade the sheep
that their interests and his own are the same. Stendhal February 4, 2009
King Obama, The Czar of the Czars...
Smaller cars, fewer guns… And cigars will be taxed by the size... Did we miss the disguise which O-Bum wore flying from Mars?
Nobody was really surprised when it happened,
not really, not at the subconscious level where savage things grow. Stephen King Carrie (1974) February 3, 2009
Fellow citizens! This must've been
quite a hard one, and right on the chin... Don't you think it's the time to deter further crime and protect our innocent kin?
You can do anything in this world
if you are prepared to take the consequences. W. Somerset Maugham The Circle: A Comedy in Three Acts (1921)
Self-defense is the clearest of all laws,
and for this reason — the lawyers did not make it. Douglas Jerrold in Bon-mots of Charles Lamb and Douglas Jerrold by Walter Jerrold (1893) February 2, 2009
King Obama did not like his mama,
and his mama did not like Obama, so she ran from this child, who was very much riled and grew up under stress of this drama.
A little curly-headed, good-for-nothing,
And mischief-making monkey from his birth. Lord Byron Don Juan (1819)
Eric: C'mon, Kyle.
Just because your mom is a b#@ch doesn't mean that we all have to suffer. South Park (1997) February 1, 2009
Our country is now for sale.
He bailed out all things he could bail, driving all to be poor, angry, sad, insecure... Hey, Obama! We want you to fail! January 31, 2009
Muses rested today. They are tired.
They've told us that they've acquired a distaste for O-Bum (they are keeping it mum, but they hope that he soon will be fired).
The feelings of childhood, which taught thee to soar,
Are wafted far distant on Apathy's wing. Lord Byron Farewell to the Muse (1807)
It's a little like wrestling a gorilla.
You don't quit when you're tired — you quit when the gorilla is tired. Robert Strauss The Winner Within by Pat Riley (1993) January 30, 2009
FDR has been right at the top
of his trouble and he couldn't stop the Depression. The War saved his a#@ and his score. Yes — you got World War III, coming up...
Nothing is more insolent or provocative
or more apt to lead to a breach of the peace than undefended riches among armed men. Douglas MacArthur in MacArthur: Man of Action by Frank Kelley (1950)
I do not know how the Third World War
will be fought, but I can tell you what they will use in the Fourth — rocks! Albert Einstein January 29, 2009
King Barack had the flappiest ears,
which were never discussed by his peers, but were used as his sails for the winds of his tales (yes, we know: this brings him to tears...).
His ears stuck out to the sides of his head
as if he were straining to listen to every little sound. Terry Goodkind Naked Empire (2003)
Timothy Q. Mouse: Your ears!
Just look at 'em, Dumbo! Why, they're poifect wings! The very things that held ya down are gonna carry ya up, and up, and up! Dumbo (1941) January 28, 2009
There once was Ahmadinejad,
rabid, stupid, a jerk, and Jihad was his only concern. Then he painfully learned that Obama is almost as bad...
Presidential campaign slogans:
Ahmadinejad, 2005: “It's possible and we can do it”. Bamster, 2008: “Yes, we can”. January 27, 2009
Try to think outside of the box:
Messrs. Mouthfoot, Nostrils, and Bucks, Messrs. Queen and Dead-Brain, and the top of this chain, Mr. Ears and Mrs. Botox.
It's a match made in heaven... by a retarded angel.
The Curse of the Jade Scorpion (2001) January 26, 2009
Just a week — look at where we are.
But there are no surprises thus far: Bamioso will prey on executive pay, cutting more every day — from afar.
When it comes to the future,
there are three kinds of people: those who let it happen, those who make it happen, and those who wonder what happened. John M. Richardson, Jr.
Those politicians, professors and union bosses
who curse big business are fighting for a lower standard of living. Ludwig von Mises Theory and History (1957) January 25, 2009
Bamster visited all fifty seven
(must have!...) states, where visions of Heaven all pertain to Jihad, not U.S. Thank you, God, for M1 and M1911!
Man's great misfortune is that he has no organ,
no kind of eyelid or brake, to mask or block a thought, or all thought, when he wants to. Paul Valéry
There is wickedness in the intention of wickedness,
even though it be not perpetrated in the act. Cicero in A Dictionary of Thoughts by Tryon Edwards January 24, 2009
For a second, imagine a day
with O-Bum far, faR, fAR, FAR away. Then imagine — it's true! This will carry you through to the future he strives to delay.
Swallow a toad in the morning
and you will encounter nothing more disgusting the rest of the day. M. de Lassay, quoted by Nicolas de Chamfort in Chamfort: A Biography by Claude Arnaud (1988)
The future will be better tomorrow.
Dan Quayle January 23, 2009
How bad can a president get?
We don't know... but we'd make a bet that the one we have gotten has been fairly rotten — he's the worst that we ever have met...
Asinus asinorum in saecula saeculorum!
[Latin, “The Jackass of Jackasses in the Century of Centuries”]
Idea for story:
A man awakens to find his parrot has been made Secretary of Agriculture. Woody Allen Without Feathers (1975) January 22, 2009
When this circus has come to our town,
it did not earn much more than a frown — actors weren't too deft... While the circus has left, we got stuck with Obama The Clown...
Now the freaks are on television, the freaks are in the movies.
And it's no longer the sideshow, it's the whole show. The colorful circus and the clowns and the elephants, for all intents and purposes, are gone, and we're dealing only with the freaks. Jonathan Winters January 21, 2009
We have sinned, and the Heavens have struck
with a plague by the name of Barack. Now, Mr. Barack has arrived. We are stuck 'cause it's us he is planning to f#@k.
Hobbes: I had resolved
to be less offended by human nature, but I think I blew it already. Calvin and Hobbes (1988) January 20, 2009
All who lived through this inauguration,
felt a measure of valid frustration: some because they were f#@$ed, some because they were mocked, some because they detest obfuscation.
But then the Roman Empire fell
like this: “oh, s#@t...”. And we went into what the historians called the Stupid F#@$er period. Eddie Izzard Circle (2002) 
January 19, 2009
When O-Bum and his Reverend “spin”,
it looks quite like a homemade sin: everybody fakes theirs, emulating the airs, while suppressing a knowing grin...
Even to the vulgarity of inanimate things
it requires some time to get accustomed; but living, breathing, bustling, plotting, planning, human vulgarity is a species of moral ipecacuanha, enough to destroy any comfort. Thomas Carlyle On Being Poor in The Gentle Life by James Hain Friswell (1866)
Show me a liar, and I'll show thee a thief.
George Herbert Jacula Prudentium (1651) The Works of George Herbert (1862) January 18, 2009
Our leader is planning ahead.
He does not want us all to be dead. He's just cornering those who would fight for the cause — those who'd rather be dead than be Red...
Michael Corleone: I don't feel I have to
wipe everybody out, Tom. Just my enemies. Godfather: Part II (1974)
The ultimate basis of an all around
bureaucratic system is violence. Ludwig von Mises Bureaucracy (1944) January 17, 2009
We have no time left for discussions
with Chinese, North Koreans, and Russians... Add Iran and Iraq — looks like Barry is stuck, facing very direct repercussions.
Then does men's life become one vast disease
When once they seek their ills by ills to cure. Sophocles Fragments, 98
There comes a time in the affairs of man
when he must take the bull by the tail and face the situation. W. C. Fields January 16, 2009
There once was a girl named Michelle,
(not your typical Southern belle). All observers concur: this one carried her Marxist heart in an apposite shell.
Rita: I'd like to make her look
a little more attractive. How far can you pull back? Cameraman: How do you feel about Cleveland? Tootsie (1982)
I do not know that she was virtuous;
but she was always ugly, and with a woman, that is half the battle. Heinrich Heine Scintillations (1873) January 15, 2009
For Barack the relentless left-winger
we are practicing flipping the finger in a proper salute to his rotten repute, which came first and continues to linger.
After the events of the 20th century —
national socialism, international socialism, inter-species socialism from Earth First — anyone who is still on the left is obviously insane and not responsible for his or her actions. P. J. O'Rourke We Blew It (2008)
So let him stand, through ages yet unborn,
Fix'd statue on the pedestal of Scorn. Lord Byron Curse of Minerva (1811) January 14, 2009
“Mom? Are any of things that I hear
true at all? If they are, should I fear our government?” “No! All we have we shall owe! You shall live in Obammunism, dear!”
Another life, if it were not better than this,
would be less a promise than a threat. Jean-Antoine Petit-Senn in Pearls of Thought by Maturin M. Ballou (1882)
God will not suffer man to have the knowledge
of things to come; for if he had prescience of his prosperity, he would be careless; and understanding of his adversity, he would be senseless. St. Aurelius Augustine in Prose quotations from Socrates to Macaulay by Samuel Austin Allibone (1876) January 13, 2009
Hey, Obama! You won? No. You lied.
Time has not crossed the bridge to your side. Time can see from afar, so it knows: you are human misery, exemplified.
But all the clocks in the city
Began to whirr and chime: “O let not Time deceive you, You cannot conquer Time.” W. H. Auden As I Walked Out One Evening (1937)
Diplomacy is the art of saying “Nice doggie”
until you can find a rock. Wynn Catlin in The Laugh's on Me by Bennett Cerf (1959) January 12, 2009
Bum keeps talking of slicing and splicing,
Bum keeps talking of us sacrificing something else — every day. Does he think we'll pay for the ride that he finds so enticing?
The tenth commandment sends a message
to collectivists, to people who believe wealth is best obtained by redistribution. And the message is clear and concise: Go to hell. P. J. O'Rourke Closing the Wealth Gap (1997)
The kind of man who wants the government to adopt
and enforce his ideas is always the kind of man whose ideas are idiotic. H. L. Mencken Minority Report (1956) January 11, 2009
Dear Chairman Obamioso!
Your Obaminess is grandioso. TeleBum! TeleBoom! Telethon is in bloom! Is it permanent? Just curioso.
...Who knows himself a braggart,
Let him fear this; for it will come to pass That every braggart shall be found an ass. William Shakespeare All's Well That Ends Well (1623)
What kills the skunk
is the publicity it gives itself. Abraham Lincoln Speech in Columbus, Ohio (1859) January 10, 2009
Che Guevara, Alinsky and Marx
(three deceivers, one bum, and two sharks) were content to find out that O-Bum is about halfway through with his indigent “sparks”.
From a spark a fire will flare up.
The official slogan of the first Lenin's newspaper Iskra (Spark) December 1, 1900
It may be true, as Lincoln supposed,
that “you can't fool all the people all the time,” but you can fool enough of them to rule a large country. Will Durant The Lessons of History (1968) January 9, 2009
He was lobbed to his job by the mob.
He has not even started the job, but we already heard (at the edge of his herd) that two terms are too short for this snob.
The true definition of a snob
is one who craves for what separates men rather than for what unites them. John Buchan Pilgrim's Way: An Essay in Recollection (1940)
No person shall be elected to the office of the President
more than twice, and no person who has held the office of President, or acted as President, for more than two years of a term to which some other person was elected President shall be elected to the office of the President more than once. The Constitution of the United States Amendment XXII, Section 1 (February 27, 1951) January 8, 2009
We do not like this man named Barack,
his intentions, his goals, or his flock. One big f#@$ing mistake that was made by this fake: he assumed we'll be staying in shock.
The fraud being once established,
could not afterwards be explained; for it is with pious fraud as with a bad action; it begets a calamitous necessity of going on. Thomas Paine The Age of Reason (1794)
Harry Street: That's one thing about success —
even when it's a failure. It snowballs for a while. There's also one thing about a snowball — it has nowhere to go but downhill. The Snows of Kilimanjaro (1952) January 7, 2009
Kenya has been like Mecca for hunters —
every game... but there are few Black Panthers. Maybe, we should deport all we have of this sort, booking shipments along with the gun tours...
You can't teach a hunter it's wrong to kill.
Hari Dass Baba
There is no hunting like the hunting of man,
and those who have hunted armed men long enough and liked it, never care for anything else thereafter. Ernest Hemingway On The Blue Water: A Gulf Stream Letter (1936) January 6, 2009
We have heard, Disney quickly recalled
all the copies, and plans are on hold for the “Dumbo” release. They're trying to ease the suspicion they used Bamster's mold.
Do your ears hang low?
Do they wobble to and fro? Children's song January 5, 2009
Every night, right before dream-o-rama,
you (and others) may think of Obama, promptly losing your sleep. Just in case, our tip: think of life past the end of this drama...
Sometimes I lie awake at night, and ask,
“Where have I gone wrong?” Then a voice says to me, “This is going to take more than one night.” Charles M. Schulz Peanuts
Take therefore no thought for the morrow:
for the morrow shall take thought for the things of itself. Sufficient unto the day is the evil thereof. Matthew 6:34 (KJV) January 4, 2009
You should know the guy named Barack,
not a nerd, not a geek, not a jock, who has gone to the top on the wings of the mob, which has staged an amazing comeback...
Roth: What I am saying is,
we have now what we have always needed, real partnership with the government. Godfather: Part II (1974) January 3, 2009
There once was a girl named Michelle.
When we saw her, we didn't feel well contemplating her prance, which we felt, at a glance, had a touch of a Harpy from Hell.
Awkward, embarrassed, stiff, without the skill
Of moving gracefully or standing still, One leg, as if suspicious of his brother, Desirous seems to run away from t'other. Charles Churchill The Rosciad (1891) January 2, 2009
In Jerusalem, there is The Wall.
That's the place for all wishes — from all. We had asked for a roll to be stuck in the hole with the names that He needs to recall.
If any thing can legalize revenge,
it should be injury from an extremely obliged person; but revenge is so absolutely the peculiar of Heaven that no consideration can impower, even the best men, to assume the execution of it. Robert South in A Dictionary of the English Language by Samuel Johnson (1805)
Lord, Lord, Lord.
Protect me from the consequences of the above prayer. Amen. Douglas Adams Mostly Harmless (1992) New Year · January 1, 2009
We were told that the winter of our
discontent that is brewing so sour will be made into glorious summer by the notorious Sun of Kenya — if we would cower...
Now is the winter of our discontent
Made glorious summer by this sun of York... William Shakespeare Richard III (1591)
The lion and the calf shall lie down together
but the calf won't get much sleep. Woody Allen Without Feathers (1975) December 31, 2008
We're worried. The coming O-Bum
wants a chaos. In it, will be some unexpected controls. Foreseeing his goals, how Big will this Brother become?
If a man is not rising upward to be an angel,
depend upon it, he is sinking downwards to be a devil. He cannot stop at the beast. Samuel Taylor Coleridge in Coleridge's Table Talk and Omniana (1917) December 30, 2008
If they saw how Bamster is awed,
and they knew the extent of this fraud, Lenin would've gone wild, Karl Marx would've smiled (Friedrich Engels would simply applaud). December 29, 2008
Emblem, new, for U.S. Delegation
to U.N.: first, a map of the nation, done in Black and in Green, then some Red in between, and two Ears in flying formation.
Artists can color the sky red
because they know it's blue. Those of us who aren't artists must color things the way they really are or people might think we're stupid. Jules Feiffer Crawling Arnold (1963) December 28, 2008
Those that curse us, expected a blessing,
and they found it rather depressing that we were quite adverse to the meaning of verse Luke (in 6:28) is addressing.
Souls made of Fire, and Children of the Sun,
With whom Revenge is virtue. Edward Young The Revenge (1721) December 27, 2008
A design for the President's Seal:
first, a t#@d, dry, to mark the New Deal, then a fresh one, for Bum (tinted green for Islam), and a slippery yellow peel.
A t#@d for you!
You do not deserve so much good, nor so much honour. Francois Rabelais Gargantua and Pantagruel (c.1532)
Forsan et haec olim meminisse juvabit.
[Latin, “Perhaps the remembrance of these things will prove a source of future pleasure.”] Virgil The Aeneid (29 – 19 B.C.) December 26, 2008
For Obamo-Americans there:
your Messiah will be off the air from eleven to five. Don't panic — survive. Hold his picture and tell him you care.
Every form of addiction is bad,
no matter whether the narcotic be alcohol or morphine or idealism. Carl Jung Memories, Dreams, Reflections (1963)
Each time you play helpless you create
a dependency — you play a dependency game. In other words, we make ourselves slaves. Especially if this dependency is a dependency of our self-esteem. Fritz Perls Gestalt Therapy Verbatim (1972) Christmas Day · December 25, 2008
This is Christmas. No politics. None.
We could rhyme a few words just for fun, just to have a good time with a difficult rhyme, just to see how this could be done. We could start with the word “Titicaca”. It would rhyme with “Molucca” and “Yucca”. But we'd fail to complete this remarkable feat... 'cause the word we'd need is “macaca”.
(and we remember what happened to
Mr. Allen...)
I'm dreaming of a white Christmas
just like the ones I used to know... Irving Berlin White Christmas (1940) 
December 24, 2008
Winds of “change” whistling hard in our ear,
all we hear, “Obama is near”. No Kwanzaa for us, just old customs, and thus, Merry Christmas and Happy New Year! December 23, 2008
Flying up to the uppermost cloud,
Lord Obama is spoken about: “He's Movin' On Up!” We'll wait for his flop, looking forward to his Movin' Out.
Well, we're movin on up,
To the east side. To a deluxe apartment in the sky. Movin on up, To the east side. We finally got a piece of the pie. The Jeffersons (1975)
When I hear a man applauded by the mob,
I always feel a pang of pity for him. All he has to do to be hissed is to live long enough. H. L. Mencken Minority Report (1956) December 22, 2008
Urgent message, from Hell to The Chair:
“All your comrades think this is unfair. We were told Hell will freeze when U.S. on its knees will be yours to dismantle and tear. It is hot. We all think “going cold” is a promise that's getting too old. Get your a#@ down here, on the double, you hear? We are voting to have you recalled!”
Here is the difference between Dante, Milton, and me.
They wrote about hell and never saw the place. I wrote about Chicago after looking the town over for years and years. Carl Sandburg Winter Solstice · Stalin' birthday · December 21, 2008
Sharing time with his comrade — his spouse —
he recalls all the communist vows that he took as a boy, and he plans to enjoy Stalin's Birthday in Barry's White House. December 20, 2008
Fortune tellers! This time of the year,
when the solstice is getting so near, could you please tell us all if the night which will fall is as long and as dark as we fear?
How long the night seems
to one kept awake by pain. Bernard-Joseph Saurin Blanche et Guiscard (1763) December 19, 2008
Blah, blah, blah. That's Obamian call
to proceed. He is trying to stall 'cause he has no clue what to do, when it's due, and he has no solutions, at all.
There's no reason to become alarmed,
and we hope you'll enjoy the rest of your flight. By the way, is there anyone on board who knows how to fly a plane? Airplane! (1980) 
December 18, 2008
Bummer tries (and he cries as he tries)
to create “All-American” lies. He is aided and helped by the brood that he whelped, but this brood stocks imported supplies.
A man who thinks of himself as belonging
to a particular national group in America has not yet become an American, and the man who goes among you to trade upon your nationality is no worthy son to live under the Stars and Stripes. Woodrow T. Wilson (1915)
Falsehood is invariably the child of fear
in one form or another. Aleister Crowley The Confessions of Aleister Crowley (1929) December 17, 2008
There once was one Barry, a boy,
who grew up to annoy and destroy. Early on, it appears, someone said: “Flap your ears! That'll do. You do not need a toy.” This was part of a communist ploy. Barry wanted few things to enjoy. Someone said: “Beat the rich. That's the ultimate niche for all those who do not have the toy.” Barry learned many ways to deploy one's resolve to acquire the toy: fear, fraud and deceit, mixed together, or neat — and grew up to annoy and destroy.
There is no absurdity so palpable but that it may
be firmly planted in the human head if you only begin to inculcate it before the age of five, by constantly repeating it with an air of great solemnity. Arthur Schopenhauer Parerga und Paralipomena (1851) December 16, 2008
Two big Ears. Electoral dice.
Overpaid (confidential) price. How would we name this quick ascent from abyss? “Bum's Earlift” would be very precise.
If one person tell thee that thou hast ass's ears,
take no notice; should two tell thee so, procure a saddle for thyself. Ancient Jewish Proverbs by Abraham Cohen (1911) December 15, 2008
Bum has seen flying shoes in the news.
You can send us all kinds of big shoes. We'll give them away to the children, OK? Not to wear — to practice the use.
Every child comes with the message
that God is not yet discouraged of man. Rabindranath Tagore Stray Birds (1916) December 14, 2008
If you listen to Larry Sinclair,
you'd know: his Bummer's affair was a Limo-Lewinsky. What would say Saul Alinsky? “Rule 11. And do it with flair.”
Rule 11:
If you push a negative hard and deep enough, it will break through into its counterside. Saul Alinsky Rules For Radicals (1971)
Bisexual, adj.
A politically correct way to say you f#@k anything. Overheard on the Net December 13, 2008
Oh, rebellious Pinkos! Your hue
seems to make you an object to screw... No, you aren't the Red, though, the Red made your bed... Pity rebels without a clue.
So much of left-wing thought is a kind of
playing with fire by people who don't even know that fire is hot. George Orwell Inside the Whale (1940)
...and some of these college professors
are just about as bad, the whole kit and bilin' of 'em are nothing in God's world but socialism in disguise! Sinclair Lewis Main Street (1920) December 12, 2008
How much will Obama be paid
(with all deals he has managed and made)? We would think all his pay should be taken away — it is plainly exceeding his grade.
There are two kinds of failures:
those who thought and never did, and those who did and never thought. Laurence J. Peter
“...I doubt very seriously whether anyone will hire me.”
“What do you mean, babe? You a fine boy with a good education.” “Employers sense in me a denial of their values.” John Kennedy Toole Confederacy of Dunces (1980) December 11, 2008
Windy City provided the wind.
Spreading Ears, Bum flew. Being pinned, these appendages would keep him back in the hood to continue to worship The Fiend.
“Hail, holy Ass!” the quiring angels sing;
“Priest of Unreason, and of Discords King! Great co-Creator, let Thy glory shine: God made all else, the Mule, the Mule is thine!” G.J. (Father Gassalasca Jape, S.J.) Ambrose Bierce The Devil's Dictionary (1911)
...characterized by an uncommon spread of ear,
which some naturalists contend gave him the power of flight... Ambrose Bierce The Devil's Dictionary (1911) December 10, 2008
We've got a corrupt politician
on his way to his ultimate mission: to dismantle defenses for all future offenses of his gang — under any condition.
When buying and selling are controlled by legislation,
the first things to be bought and sold are legislators. P. J. O'Rourke Parliament of Whores (1991) December 9, 2008
Our country's electoral trance
has been caused by the Bummer's romance, and when Bummer will fail, all his b#@ches will wail: “He was simply not given a chance!” December 8, 2008
You just wait. All the wealth of this nation
will be nationalized by taxation. To accomplish this deed, Bum will deftly proceed using Putin as his inspiration.
Socialist governments traditionally do make a financial mess.
They always run out of other people's money. Margaret Thatcher (1976)
We hope that, when the insects take over the world,
they will remember with gratitude how we took them along on all our picnics. Bill Vaughn December 7, 2008
Seeking ways for Obama to sink,
we keep seeing the link, Red and Pink. So, we are on the brink of a horrible stink. Just the place for a Boojum, we think.
But oh, beamish nephew, beware of the day,
If your Snark be a Boojum! For then You will softly and suddenly vanish away, And never be met with again! Lewis Carroll The Hunting of the Snark (1874)
If a convert to Communism could be persuaded
that he was a citizen of the world, it of course would be much easier to make him a traitor to his own country. Joseph R. McCarthy (1954) December 6, 2008
“Honeymoon: Love Forever”. “Divorce”
isn't part of this mindset, of course. “Being f#@$ed by Barack” isn't yet a bad luck — it's too early for “buyer's remorse”.
“Luck” is taking probability personally.
Chip Denman (1998) December 5, 2008
This is what the O-Bummer's Right Ear
told the left one: “Recession, I hear?” And the Left Ear said (to the Right, through the head): “You are deaf — The Depression, my dear!”
The Great Depression, like most other periods of severe unemployment,
was produced by government mismanagement rather than by any inherent instability of the private economy. Milton Friedman Capitalism and Freedom (1962)
Cutting off mule's ears doesn't make it a horse.
Creole proverb in Gombo Zhebes by Lafcadio Hearn (1885) December 4, 2008
No, Obama is not from Nantucket.
His is short and no way he could suck it. But we heard that the mob got a cheap b#@$&%b — and it did put some change in his pocket.
I regret to say that we of the FBI are powerless
to act in cases of oral-genital intimacy, unless it has in some way obstructed interstate commerce. J. Edgar Hoover December 3, 2008
There once was a blast in BHOpal.
Retributions helped their morale. But with our blast, came the ghoul with the past: BHO, Ayers' pupil and pal.
I don't regret setting bombs.
I feel we didn't do enough. Bill Ayers New York Times, September 11, 2001 December 2, 2008
Saul Alinsky is, properly, dead.
Hell is frozen. The Devil has fled. The community drive now wants to revive plans to get Pearly Gates painted Red.
Socialism will only work in heaven
where they don't want it, or in hell, where they've got it already. Cecil Palmer The British Socialist Ill-Fare State (1952)
Even a band of angels can turn ugly and start looting
if enough angels are unemployed and hanging around the pearly gates convinced that succubi own all the liquor stores in heaven. P. J. O'Rourke Parliament of Whores (1991) 
December 1, 2008
If you haven't drunk any Kool-Aid,
future won't arrive ready-made when Obamian crap will start coming, on tap, stinky, sticky, and over-pre-paid...
Tomorrow's illiterate will not be the man
who cannot read; he will be the man who has not learned how to learn. Herbert Gerjuoy in Future Shock by Alvin Toffler (1970) November 30, 2008
At the end of this blasted November
full of things that you have to remember for the next time you vote, please remember to note that ACORN is the beast to dismember.
The first step in community organization
is community disorganization. Saul Alinsky Rules For Radicals (1971) 
November 29, 2008
Contemplating both virtue and vice,
think of this (it will fully suffice): would you mark your connection to the recent election by a toast, or a goat sacrifice???
Where but in Kenya can a man
whose grandfather was a cannibal watch a really good game of polo? Marina Sulzberger Letters (1978) 
November 28, 2008
Sing, Fat Lady! C'mon, you Big Mama!
Someone has to wrap up all this drama of the Fraud from Abroad! No, we wouldn't applaud — we're tired of Mr. Obama.
Boredom is rage spread thin.
Paul Tillich Thanksgiving Day · November 27, 2008
On Thanksgiving, with bad expectations,
we shall pray for all people of nations with no freedom for all. They'll suffer the call to submit to the Marxist temptations.
Underlying most arguments against the free market
is a lack of belief in freedom itself. Milton Friedman Capitalism and Freedom (1962)
When it becomes dominated by a collectivist creed,
democracy will inevitably destroy itself. Friedrich Hayek The Road To Serfdom (1944) 
November 26, 2008
Enter Holiday Season with Hope —
not the one that was claimed by The Dope who has peddled the Change you'd get in exchange for the knot at the end of your rope. November 25, 2008
In Somali, they got it all wrong.
They can have what they want — for a song: just export to U.S. one of yours to profess what you like. He'll drag you along.
Mulder: I see the correlation, but just because
I work for the federal government doesn't mean I'm an expert on cockroaches. The X Files: War of the Coprophages (1996)
These days even the devil is getting overturned
and held up to the light like a glass of water. Anne Sexton Cockroach (1974) November 24, 2008
We've heard: “You are mean! You are vile!
You do not have the grace or the style!”... We were hit by this chorus, while observing George Soros who had shorted the market meanwhile...
He is one of those wise philanthropists
who in a time of famine would vote for nothing but a supply of toothpicks. Douglas Jerrold in Bon-mots of Charles Lamb and Douglas Jerrold by Walter Jerrold (1893) November 23, 2008
We believe life begins at conception.
but “what if” we could make a correction? Chávez? Putin? Obama? Each of them had a mama... For Obama, we'd make an exception.
Why don't some people
just shoot themselves in the head the day they are born? Martin Cruz Smith Polar Star (1989) 
November 22, 2008
There once was a man named Obama.
And of course, he had papa and mama. But his papa was gone, leaving mama alone... Now, we have to pay for this drama.
“God is dead” is simply
an undisguised Oedipal wish-fulfillment. Paul C. Vitz Faith of the Fatherless: The Psychology of Atheism (1999)
Oedipus: Ye sicken all, well wot I, yet my pain,
How great soever yours, outtops it all. Sophocles Oedipus Rex (c.429 B.C.) November 21, 2008
Here's how the common sense died.
Single women have powered the ride. No, McCain couldn't win, not against this machine: Jesus Christ would've lost if he tried...
You speak the truth unlike the right...
You can barack me tonight. Obama Girl I Got a Crush On Obama (2007)
Samantha: If we could perpetually do b#@$&%bs
to every guy on earth, we would own the world. And at the same time have our hands free. Sex and the City (1998) 
November 20, 2008
There once was a man named Barack.
When he posed for his photos, he'd chack (an archaic expression used for horse's obsession with the bridle which kept him on track...).
Money is the string with which a sardonic destiny
directs the motions of its puppets. W. Somerset Maugham
...the other, danced the dance
of a marionette with a few too many masters and tangled string dancing to someone else's tune knowing at some level the fate he would bear for the choice to dance... Raymond A. Foss Dance of the Marionette (2006) World Toilet Day · November 19, 2008
Bamioso is looking quite dapper,
'cause today is The Day of the Crapper. But the point not to miss is the essence of this P.O.S. in a showy wrapper.
I may not know much,
but I know chicken s#@t from chicken salad. Lyndon B. Johnson in The Best and the Brightest by David Halberstam (1969)
Hood an ass in reverend purple,
So you can hide his too ambitious ears, And he shall pass for a cathedral doctor. Ben Jonson Volpone (1606) 
November 18, 2008
All Obamian zombies! Your cheers
have been heard, but it now appears that you still have no clue what will happen to you, when you start screaming into those Ears.
The ear of the leader must ring
with the voices of the people. Woodrow T. Wilson Leaders of Men (1889)
I said it very loud and clear:
I went and shouted in his ear. But he was very stiff and proud: He said, “You needn't shout so loud!” Lewis Carroll Through the Looking Glass (1872) November 17, 2008
There once was a guy named Barack.
He had Ears in need of a tuck. But with budget constraints, there were loud complaints that it cannot be done for the schmuck...
If the person you are talking to doesn't appear
to be listening, be patient. It may simply be that he has a small piece of fluff in his ear. A. A. Milne Winnie-the-Pooh (1926) November 16, 2008
There once was a man named Barack,
whose career was nothing but luck. He was chosen to lead. Someone paid for the deed. Now everyone says: “What the f#@k ?...”
In certain trying circumstances,
urgent circumstances, desperate circumstances, profanity furnishes a relief denied even to prayer. Mark Twain in Mark Twain: A Biography by Albert Bigelow Paine (1912)
The Stranger: There's just one thing, Dude.
The Dude: And what's that? The Stranger: Do you have to use so many cuss words? The Dude: What the f#@k you talking about? The Stranger: Okay, Dude. Have it your way. The Big Lebowski (1998) November 15, 2008
He's the one who came out of hiding
with the flock he was tending and guiding. They have left their porch and have wrestled the torch from those guys who were busy deciding...
The sad truth is that most evil is done by people
who never make up their minds to be good or evil. Hannah Arendt The Life of the Mind (1978)
Some will say, in the years to come, a halo
or force stood around him. There was no such thing. Les Murray An Absolutely Ordinary Rainbow (1969) 
November 14, 2008
Our president thinks he is black.
He is white just as much, but his track was cleared up by his choice to unite girls and boys who, beyond this, did not know jack...
If you young fellows were wise,
the devil couldn't do anything to you, but since you aren't wise, you need us who are old. Martin Luther Table Talk (1967)
No greater injury can be done to any youth
than to let him feel that because he belongs to this or that race he will be advanced in life regardless of his own merits or efforts. Booker T. Washington The Booker T. Washington Papers (1982) 
November 13, 2008
There is now a man named Barack.
He'll teach you to cover and duck. Corps of Civil Defense will be beating some sense into citizens pushing their luck...
His motto is:“Give before it hurts.”
Calvin and Hobbes (1990)
Standing armies [are] inconsistent
with [a people's] freedom and subversive of their quiet. Thomas Jefferson to Lord North (1775) 
November 12, 2008
Those of us who have voted and lost
aren't ready to give up the ghost. This is what we believe: for as long as we live, we shall fight, disregarding the cost.
The question isn't who is going to let me,
it is who is going to stop me. Ayn Rand The Fountainhead (1943) 
November 11, 2008
There once was a man named Barack.
He was dark, but not really black. This particular shade was most likely to fade when it rubbed off the green of the buck...
Life is a corrupting process from the time
a child learns to play his mother off against his father in the politics of when to go to bed; he who fears corruption fears life. Saul Alinsky Rules For Radicals (1971) 
November 10, 2008
News today range from blabber to porn,
and remotes are all beaten and worn. We are terribly tired. IF you are a Messiah, makes no difference where you're born. But this IF is so-o-o big... Let's see either miracles or a BC. Walk on water, or show f#@$ing papers. We'll know whether we talk to “you” — or to “Thee”...
Bank Manager: I will need two pieces of identification.
Navin R. Johnson: Ah yes. I have my temporary driver's license — and — my astronaut application form... I didn't pass that though, I failed everything but the date of birth. The Jerk (1979) 
November 9, 2008
“This is it. This must be the nirvana!”
“It's a gift. Just a gift. Gift from Santa...” “Rigged or not — it's legit! I have won! I am it!...” “This is Sunday! Go have a banana...”
His venture sounds like a banana peel
awaiting its victim. Charlotte Curtis Two Roads to Dodge City (1985)
On some great and glorious day the plain folks of the land
will reach their heart's desire at last, and the White House will be adorned by a downright moron. H. L. Mencken Bayard vs. Lionheart (1920) 
November 8, 2008
Can you find a good rhyme for “Obama”?
If “Obama” is rhymed with a “bummer”, it implies nothing more than we stated before: our choices are getting much dumber...
The United States has got some of
the dumbest people in the world. I want you to know that we know that. Ted Turner (1996)
One of the penalties for refusing to participate in politics,
is that you end up being governed by your inferiors. Plato Republic (c.380 B.C.) 
November 7, 2008
Nineteen Seventeen Chaos, detailed:
when the intelligentsia failed to stand up to the Red, it was quietly led to be killed or, at least, to be jailed. Enter Chaos Two Thousand Nine. Very similar evil design. Only difference is, we are ready for this, and we won't surrender in line.
Courage is not simply one of the virtues,
but the form of every virtue at the testing point. C. S. Lewis The Screwtape Letters (1942)
Whatever crushes individuality is despotism,
by whatever name it may be called. John Stuart Mill On Liberty (1859) 
November 6, 2008
Hey, Obama! You can't conceal
such a thing, but we can't appeal... Votes were tallied — wow! You have won. Tell us now: how many of them did you steal?
Cousin Zeb: Isn't that a game of chance?
Cuthbert J. Twillie: No, my dear, not the way I play it. My Little Chickadee (1940)
Voters want a fraud they can believe in.
Will Durst 
November 5, 2008
Hey, Michelle! What's the deal with the dress?
Did you flaunt all the things you profess? You were bearing big marks in the colors of Marx in a spiderly pattern, no less... 
November 4, 2008
Our country went totally nuts.
Masses picked one electable putz, whose election was bought with the money he brought from abroad, where they hate our guts...
Socialism is a philosophy of failure,
the creed of ignorance, and the gospel of envy, its inherent virtue is the equal sharing of misery. Winston Churchill Scottish Unionist Conference (1948) 
|
barack obama is your new bicycle · best obama facts · the people's cube · barack to ahmadinejad · dreams of my (communist) father · life of barry · onion on obama
barackbook · totus blog · obama playing cards · teleprompter message
barackbook · totus blog · obama playing cards · teleprompter message
Terms & Conditions|Privacy Notice|Copyright & Trademark Notice|Copyright © 2008-2009 OBAMAFU.COM|All Rights Reserved.
